VOICEOVER (VO): The nation's favorite celebrities... Oh, that is good.

VO: ..paired up with an expert...

I like that.

VO: ..and a classic car.

Feeling confident?

Er... VO: Their mission?

To scour Britain for antiques.

(GLASS SMASHES) Look at you.

You're really good!

VO: The aim - to make the biggest profit at auction.

(GASPS) Is it a find?

VO: But it's no easy ride.

XAND VAN TULLEKEN: Hey, come on!

VO: Who will find a hidden gem?

(MIMICS DUCK) Take me with you.

VO: Take the biggest risk?

Have you got a tow truck?

VO: Will anybody follow expert advice?

I might have bought rubbish.

Who knows?

VO: There will be worthy winners... Yay!

Whoo!

VO: ..and valiant losers.

Come on.

Someone else!

Someone!

VO: Put your pedal to the metal!

Aah!

VO: This is the Celebrity Antiques Road Trip.

Yeah!

VO: Today we're down in Devon with a couple of famous faces who are also great chums.

What do you reckon to this... this little gig we're on, then?

Well, I thought it was antique celebrities when I heard you were doing it.

You're so rude!

VO: Yes, that's top TV journalist Jennie Bond at the wheel and at her side, newsman Simon McCoy.

SIMON: I didn't know you were into antiques.

Are you into your antiques?

I presented Cash In The Attic for about five years!

Well, we were both royal correspondents.

Doesn't mean we knew anything about the royals!

VO: I think they may have picked up more than a bit, what with Jennie having been a reporter on the Windsor beat throughout the 1990s.

She's presented a lot of very different programs, including the Chelsea Flower Show.

(ENGINE REVS) Ooh!

It's quite fast, isn't it?

VO: While, Simon - quite an anchorman himself - was also a royal correspondent, and Jennie's opposite number for much of the most turbulent times.

One of the few jobs where we were dealing with the press office, whose job was to not tell us anything and if we were onto a story to try and steer us as far away as possible.

VO: Our news hands will be pursuing antiques with equal vigor, and negotiating the Devonian B roads in a 1962 Austin Healey.

Lovely.

Hey!

Woo!

I think Cruella de Vil drove one of these.

I don't know what made me think of that.

(JENNIE LAUGHS) VO: No puppies purchased, please.

Which I'm sure would also be the sage advice of their experts in the E-Type.

Two...broadcasting royalty.

Fantastic.

Yeah, I'm looking forward to the stories!

VO: They do seem a little star struck, don't they?

"They" being Margie Cooper, from Cheshire, and Kent's very own Raj Bisram.

I mean, do you know Devon very well?

Not really, no.

Because I've got the Lake District, I've got North Wales.

(POSH VOICE) Oh, have you?

And I love the way you're doing the royal wave already.

Oh, with the royal correspondents!

VO: Lordy.

Almost time to get started, with £400 each.

Not that they must spend the lot, of course.

I'm quite worried about the haggling cos I think I'm too nice.

SIMON: Whereas you... JENNIE (JB): Oh, I am a haggler.

I remember the Buckingham Palace press office and you were always the one who asked the question we were all too terrified to ask.

Yeah, well, I will haggle.

I think that's the key.

Not spend too much.

I've seen people make a big, big purchase, and they... they lose it all.

VO: Canny stuff.

Their Devon rummage shouldn't be too unfamiliar, as they both live around this neck of the woods.

And they kick off in Kingsbridge.

On the delightful Kingsbridge estuary, 18th century birthplace of William Cookworthy, the first Briton to make proper porcelain.

SIMON: You alright?

JB: Yeah.

Have we arrived?

Yay!

VO: Piece of cake.

Ooh!

Oh!

Ah, ooh, oh.

Built for comfort, these.

VO: Take your time!

I'm not sure I put the handbrake on.

Do you think it'll be alright?

No.

VO: No restraint necessary at the Kingsbridge Antiques Centre.

With their experts already hard at it.

He's nice, isn't he?

RAJ: Hello, Jennie.

JB: There you are.

JB: Hi!

RAJ: Hi.

How lovely to meet you.

And you, too.

I've seen you many times.

But I want to know, what sort of things do you like?

I'm not a collector.

I'm much more inclined to throw things out.

Of course, I've got an attic full of royal memorabilia.

True antiques, I'm not really an expert.

But I want to learn cos I've got to win.

You've GOT to win?

I've got to win.

I've got to beat Simon.

Pressure for me, as well, then.

JB: Yeah.

VO: Twas ever thus.

SIMON: Margie.

Hello.

MARGIE (MC): Simon, how are you?

I'm very well.

Nice to meet you.

Yeah, and you too.

We've got a bit of a hard day ahead, I think.

MC: We have.

Are you up for it?

SIMON: I am.

Jennie is fiercely competitive.

She's very up for it.

SIMON: So we need to get going.

MC: Right.

VO: £400 to spend, remember.

We wonder what treasures our celebrities will uncover.

RAJ: What have you found, Jennie?

Well, I'm drawn to things like this.

Inevitably.

The silver wedding anniversary of the Queen and Duke, 20th of November, 1972.

It's very nice.

It's a first day cover.

You must have lots of those things.

Well, I have got quite a lot, yes, at home.

So, I mean, I doubt anyone would pay more than £3 for it, but what do you think it might make?

£3!

RAJ: Keep looking.

JB: I will.

VO: Yes.

Let's get into double figures at least.

Simon, these are quite nice, these cider measures.

Made of...?

Copper.

With brass labels with "cider" on it.

SIMON: We are in cider country.

MC: We are.

VO: The auction's in Newcastle, however.

He's asking 38.

Which makes me think maybe they're not as old as they're trying to be.

That's a no.

MC: You're not keen?

SIMON: Er, no.

Nice, though.

If they were original, they're worth quite a bit.

The measures are really nice... Oh!

VO: Oh, lordy!

No breakages just yet.

(NARRATOR CHUCKLES) They're getting nicely warmed up, though.

Do you remember short wave?

Oh, I certainly do.

Short wave, medium wave.

I can't see any FM, but there is an F on this old thing, wh...?

RAJ: Ferranti, I believe.

JB: Ferranti?

Yeah.

A company that made obviously radios.

VO: As well as one of the first commercially available computers.

Do you know what this is made from?

Do you know what that this?

Erm... JB: Iron...?

RAJ: No, it's Bakelite.

JB: Oh, is it?

RAJ: Yeah.

It's a lovely piece.

Actually, it's really attractive.

I like the color, I like the style, I like the curves.

It's nice to touch.

We should speak to the owner.

JENNIE: It's erm...£60.

RAJ: Yeah.

I mean, in a lovely world, I'd like you to get it for 30, OK?

But if you got it for 40, I'd still be happy with it.

So, let's have a look at your negotiating skills, Jennie, OK?

(JENNIE SIGHS) JB: Right.

VO: They're off and running.

Margie, come and look at this.

VO: Aye-aye!

SIMON: It's from 1953.

MC: Right.

This at the time would have counted as your television, this was entertainment.

Yeah.

You've got a little ball and you've got to get it around the route of the coronation.

Someone over the years has obviously played with this quite a lot, but it just shows the route.

It goes from Buckingham Palace... Mm.

..St James's Palace, Guards Parade and Westminster Abbey.

'Popular portable puzzles proving positively perplexing and perpetually pleasing.'

Or words to that effect.

VO: Anyone would think he reads the news!

Jubilee year.

MC: Yeah.

How much is it?

SIMON: They are asking £18.

MC: Right.

Quality's not brilliant, but I think it's a nice thing.

We'll make a profit, won't we?

I think we should buy that.

VO: The first purchase has been decided.

Keep looking, though.

JB: Ha-ha, gotcha!

SIMON: Ah.

Ha-ha!

What are you doing?

I'm doing really well, Jennie.

I am going to do so well on this.

Although everything I like Margie's not so sure about, but we're getting there.

Yeah, I know, that's what Raj is.

I'll say, "I really like that," and he'll be ever so polite.

"Yeah...but could I show you something else?"

See, the politeness thing because you're going to haggle, aren't you?

I would not want to haggle with you, ever!

I do like a haggle, it has to be said.

This is my home town, I've got to come back here.

We'll remember that.

I'm still looking.

JB: Oh, right.

SIMON: Catch up with you later.

I have much more to do.

VO: It must have been just like that when there was a scoop in prospect!

JB: What have you found?

Do you know what this is, Jennie?

Well, it looks like a chicken brick for a very, very small chicken.

(RAJ CHUCKLES) RAJ: It's actually a pie dish.

JB: Oh.

And Wedgwood, big company, they made these.

This is late 19th century.

So, you put all the ingredients in there... JB: Yeah.

RAJ: ..but without the pastry.

It's a pie for dieters!

Kind of, yeah!

Oh, there's a whole story about it here.

Yeah.

'When flour became scarce and wasn't allowed to be used for pastry, Josiah Wedgwood found the solution.'

It's all about hard times, which we're in at the moment.

Yep, absolutely.

VO: Ticket price, £95.

But you don't think it's going to fetch us a profit?

Well, it depends what he does it for.

40 quid?

He wouldn't go down, would he?

Well, you don't know until you ask.

VO: Exactly.

I think they've passed on the pie, though.

Now, Margie, look... SIMON: If I showed you this... MC: Yeah?

..what would come to mind?

(THEY HUM THE BLUE PETER THEME) It's the Blue Peter ship, isn't it?

It is the Blue Peter ship.

And look, I mean, it's really heavy, but it's... MC: It's a companion... SIMON: It's a fire...

It's a fireside companion set and it's complete, actually.

And it's 48 quid.

Um, and it's heavy!

Actually, if that was cleaned up, it would look really good.

And it's genuine, it's 1930s.

But have we got something saleable here?

And you like it?

SIMON: I do.

MC: Right.

Which is the kiss of death.

It's just...

It's Blue Peter.

For me, Valerie Singleton, Peter Purves, John Noakes.

Yeah.

"Get down, Shep."

SIMON: Get down, Shep.

MC: Yeah.

VO: They seem happy.

It doesn't take much time to talk to the captain.

Geoffrey.

Hello.

Now, there's one thing that I love, and that's a coronation game from 1953.

VO: Priced at 18, remember.

There's another thing which...

It's a Blue Peter... MC: Half companion set.

GEOFF: The very heavy one?

SIMON: The very heavy one.

GEOFF: Excellent.

SIMON: Now, it's on at £48.

GEOFF: A bargain.

It would be a much better bargain if it was on at...40.

I think we can do it at 40 if you're buying the other at 18.

Right.

Which means you might take 55 for the two?

I would be happy to do 55 for the two.

Ooh!

Geoffrey, we have a deal.

SIMON: Thank you very much.

GEOFF: Thank you.

There we are.

VO: And he said he wasn't much of a haggler.

Nicely done.

(SIMON GRUNTS) VO: Now they just have to collect their first purchases and clear out of Kingsbridge... (SHOP BELL TINKLES) ..with £345 in hand.

Are you alright?

I'm alright.

It's heavy, though.

Yeah, I'm sure it is.

VO: Meanwhile, Jennie's already spotted that 1940s radio.

Anything a bit shinier?

Well, I think this is lovely.

I like silver, but this is real silver.

Yeah, it is.

Is it dated?

JB: Oh, yeah.

1926.

RAJ: OK. 'Silver-pierced bonbon dish.

Birmingham.'

Yeah.

I think it's lovely, the fretwork on there, but you could use it for all sorts of things.

That's a nice-looking piece.

It's not that old.

It's... it's not 100 years old yet, but it virtually is, nearly is.

JB: Yeah.

I hadn't thought of that, 1926.

Sounds quite recent to me!

VO: Ticket price, £40.

OK, so now we've seen two things.

We have.

We've seen the radio and we've seen that.

And then we can say, look, if we buy two items, what's the best you can do?

OK. VO: Putting it back for now... One last look.

Oh, this is nice.

What have you found, Jennie?

Isn't that pretty?

Isn't that pretty?

That is pretty.

I like it.

Is it gold?

Well, it says it's early gold.

RAJ: OK. JB: 'Openable locket'.

I love the pictures.

Look at that little face.

That's so cute.

VO: That one's also £40.

JB: It's about 100 years old.

RAJ: But you like it?

JB: I do like it.

I think that's something we should definitely negotiate on.

JB: OK!

VO: Oh, Geoffrey!

JB: Ah, there you are.

GEOFF: Hello.

We've found so many bits and pieces, but I've settled on this.

GEOFF: Right.

I think it's gorgeous.

JB: That's £40.

GEOFF: Mm-hm.

But I'm also interested in the radio because I love radio.

GEOFF: Good.

But what can we do for the two of them?

What's on the radio at the moment?

60.

I think for the two of them... ..we could do... 90... 83.

83.

JB: 83!

GEOFF: 83.

JB: Oh!

Alright.

RAJ: Brilliant.

JB: Yes?

RAJ: Yes!

VO: Who knows where she got 83 from, but 43 for the radio and 40 for the locket, both stowed in the back of a slightly soggy Healey.

And while they tootle off with 317 left... ..we'll catch up with the others easing the E-Type through the local lanes.

Are you enjoying the car?

But you know, Margie, this is one item on my bucket list, it's just been ticked with this.

This was the car of my dream as a young boy, an E-Type Jaguar.

And fairly recently I was thinking, "Do you know what?

I don't think I'll ever get to drive one."

Aw.

And look, this is...

It's lovely to meet you, Margie... and to drive this car as well.

MC: So it's a double whammy.

SIMON: Double whammy.

VO: Always happy to help, especially if it impresses a jet-setting journalist.

Simon, you've had a fantastic career.

So what's your most memorable moment?

I remember one royal visit to South Africa.

I was met at the airport by a crew who said, "Look, we think Nelson Mandela's in a nearby township.

Would you like to interview him?"

We arrived in this township and there in the middle of a field was Nelson Mandela surrounded by 10 children.

Oh, my goodness.

And we had an hour with Nelson Mandela with no one else around.

And he was totally relaxed.

So that was a moment I will always treasure.

So, are you an antique fan?

I have a thing about clocks.

If someone puts a clock in front of me that's not working.

I will spend hours just trying to work out... MC: Oh, really?

SIMON: ..how it works, how to fix it, and 10 times out of 10, it will end up still not working, but I really enjoy that process.

VO: Well, let's hope he's also keen on woodworking... ..because they're off to the village of Ermington.

Noted both for its church with a crooked spire and the story of three Victorian woodcarving sisters.

(MARGIE LAUGHS) VO: Conservation architect Grant Elliott is here to explain.

SIMON: Hello, Grant.

How lovely to see you.

We have some fantastic woodcarving inside.

Please come in and have a look.

I'd love to have a look.

Thank you.

VO: St Peter and St Paul - like many other churches in Devon and Cornwall - contains the highly distinctive work of the Pinwill sisters - the daughters of the local parish priest who went on to become professional ecclesiastical carvers.

GRANT: The Reverend Pinwill came to the church in 1880 and he set about restoring the church.

But while he was here, he asked the woodcarvers to teach his seven daughters.

SIMON: Seven daughters?

GRANT: Seven daughters.

And they did quite a lot of the wood carving in the church themselves.

And three of them, Mary, Ann and Violet, then went on to set up their own company afterwards.

Having a company for women, that was highly unusual, wasn't it?

It was, particularly in the Victorian time.

So, they set up their name as Rashleigh, Pinwill and Co. Rashleigh was Mary's second Christian name, but it sounded as though the business was owned by a man.

VO: Based on the success of their work here, the Pinwill sisters opened a workshop in Plymouth at the same address as Edmund Sedding - the architect of the Ermington Church Restoration and a great supporter.

So Grant, just talk us through some of the other things that they did in this church.

Well, we have the font cover which we've just passed by the front door.

Then we have the small reredos panel and the altar rails.

We have the huge, fantastic pulpit which they did when they were 16.

16, Grant!

That's a remarkable age, particularly when you look at the detail of this.

Yes.

And there are figures on each corner.

Here we have St Peter holding the keys to heaven.

Below we have the three Pinwill sisters as their angels.

VO: Although, as they grew up, their joint project was to be short-lived, with first Mary getting married and then Annie moving to Kingston to continue as a woodcarver there, Violet carried on until her death at the age of 82.

At the height of her career, she employed over 20 workmen in her business.

She never got married.

She was a devout Christian and very much saw her work as beautifying God's churches.

VO: What an amazing woman.

And, so as to enter fully into the spirit of what the Pinwills achieved, Simon and Margie have come for a lesson from local woodcarver, William Barsley.

Hi, Will.

Hi, guys.

How are you doing?

Well...that's quite a thing.

So, I've prepared a bit of a design for you guys based on one that the Pinwill sisters did.

So, this is a bird from a running band, so, it's from a rood screen in one of the churches that they made.

Right.

I thought it'd be a really nice design for you guys to carve today.

We're going to use a bit of lime wood which is a really nice, soft, easy wood to carve.

I'll give you a little bit of a demo... MC: Yeah.

WILL: ..on what to do and how to hold the chisel.

So, I'm right-handed.

I tend to have my dominant hand high up on the chisel.

MC: Are you right-handed?

SIMON: Yes.

And the other one kind of a little bit halfway down.

MC: Halfway down.

WILL: That's right.

So, if you look at that little element down in the bottom there.

MC: Yeah.

It's going to be following the lines as you go.

So you don't want to go too deep.

And if you get stuck, just lower your hand and the chisel will come... MC: Come up.

WILL: ..back out of the wood.

So there's a lot of lines going on here.

What I like to start to do is just start with the outline of the bird.

MC: Right.

WILL: Then you can add in all the detail kind of afterwards.

And there is an A&E nearby, is there?!

WILL: Yeah!

VO: Simon!

That doesn't look easy.

MC: Enjoying this.

WILL: You've got the eye now.

Remind me never to upset you.

(MARGIE GIGGLES) I'm just looking at the amount of effort we're putting into it.

I know.

I haven't concentrated like this for years.

VO: Definitely coming along nicely, though.

On the day Violet died in 1957, over 185 churches in Devon, Cornwall and other counties contained at least one item created by the firm.

This is, I suppose, the moment of truth!

Here you go.

Will... Oh, that's good!

WILL: Hey, brilliant.

Look at that.

MC: You've surprised me.

You just have to spoil it, don't you?!

VO: Now, whither our other celebrity driver behind the wheel of a classic?

Oh, my God!

(ENGINE RUMBLES) We're creaking and crunching.

I know.

But are you enjoying driving it, Jennie?

I am.

This car's getting incredibly hot, actually.

Are you alright, little car?

JB: Oh, dear.

RAJ: I doubt it.

I know, it'd be good if I got out of second gear, wouldn't it, really?

But don't hold your breath!

VO: Of course, after a long and successful career as a journalist and presenter, Jennie takes every new experience in her stride.

JB: I started out in the radio newsroom writing the news.

I was so proud.

The first day was the weather forecast and I was allowed to write, "It's going to be raining in Scotland "and sunny in the south," or something.

And at the end of the Six O'Clock News, Peter Donaldson, famous newsreader, read it out.

"I wrote that!

I did that."

Ha-ha, brilliant.

VO: During Jennie's time as a royal correspondent, things were often distinctly stormy.

RAJ: I know that you were friends with Lady Di.

I mean, how close were you?

I was a journalist that she got along with and shared confidences with.

You know, "There were three of us in this marriage," all this sort of stuff.

And then at the end, annoyingly, she'd say, "Of course, Jennie, this is just between you and me and these four walls."

I'd think, "Ugh!"

So I kept it that way.

Out of all your interviews, is there maybe one that stands out to you?

Well, I suppose, when I challenged her in Angola on the landmine mission, when she was trying to get an international ban on landmines, and I said, "Ma'am, you've been accused of being a loose cannon."

And she was very shocked and said, "I'm just trying to be a humanitarian.

That's it."

That was pretty momentous.

It made an awful lot of news.

VO: Those two are en route to their next shopping assignment in the delightful town of Newton Abbot renowned for its markets, with a cheese and onion fair alongside the more traditional varieties.

And they'll be shelling out within.

JB: Oh, here we are.

VO: Seems awfully keen.

JB: Another adventure.

Let's go for it!

VO: Jennie still has £317 left, remember.

What do you think?

I like it.

I like it.

VO: But has she got a plan for spending it?

Well, I'm finding it all rather confusing, to tell you the truth, because... Well, you see, the problem is, I don't have any taste.

Anyone who knows me will know it's garish.

That's what I am.

So all these muted tones of tasteful browns and blacks... Pfft!

..you know, mean nothing to me.

But I'm learning.

Raj is teaching me and we're going to do this.

VO: That, in a nutshell, is a plan.

Jennie, have you seen one of these before?

No, I haven't.

No.

Well, it's a boot and whip rack.

You know, the wellies.

Can you imagine riding boots would go in there...

Yes, yes.

..and the whips on there, and it's in really good condition, this one.

Because they're used all the time, you know, they're chipped or broken.

VO: Ticket price, £250.

How much should we pay for it, would you say?

Really, if we wanted to make a profit at auction, we'd want to pay somewhere around the £80 mark.

Right.

OK?

Is it a risky item?

I think it's a lovely piece.

It's different as well, isn't it?

JB: Shortlist.

RAJ: Shortlist.

VO: Unless, of course, something else comes along.

And I'm almost certain it will.

What have we found there?

JB: Well, it's Clarice Cliff.

RAJ: Yeah.

JB: Even I recognize that.

RAJ: Yeah.

And I like this.

I think it's very pretty.

It's fun.

It's cheerful.

VO: Three crocus-patterned plates, £55 each.

JB: I suppose someone might have some that match.

Absolutely.

Absolutely.

Or they might just want three for their collection.

Would there have been very many of these made?

Yeah.

Crocus pattern was a very popular pattern.

VO: 20 women were employed to do the hand painting for most of the 1930s.

I think we should go for these.

OK.

Brilliant.

VO: Those sound like a wee bit more than shortlist.

Lydia is the person to talk to when they're ready.

RAJ: Jennie?

JB: Yeah.

What do you want?

What do you think of these dogs?

These little cuddly dogs?

(SHE SIGHS) I don't think they're cuddly.

RAJ: OK. JB: I think they're tatty.

Honestly, if I found them around my house, I...

I'm sorry, I'd put them in the bin.

VO: Pooches without prices - but will she poo-poo them?

Ha!

I don't get it.

I don't get it at all.

But I guess they are pretty old.

Without a doubt.

They're 1920s, 1930s.

They could be German because the Germans were very well known for making little cuddly toys.

OK.

There is a market out there for these toys.

I mean, this one has got such a lovely-looking face, look, with his tongue out.

Doesn't it draw you in a little bit?

JB: No.

RAJ: No?

(JENNIE LAUGHS) However, I want to make money.

I want to make a profit, so... Well, if we can get these for 25 to £30, I reckon they've got a profit in them.

I'm not risking too much then.

No, you're not risking too much.

OK. Not as much as you might risk on the Clarice Cliff.

(JENNIE LAUGHS) I thought we were a team!

We are, we're a team.

Absolutely, we're a team.

VO: Time to begin negotiations.

Lydia, expect random numbers!

JB: Well...Lydia.

LYDIA: Hi, Jennie.

You've got three plates there that are really nice.

I was wondering what the best deal you could do on those for me.

I could offer £25 a plate.

What do you think of that?

How does that sound?

If I buy something else as well?

That might help.

Yeah?

Might that help?

OK. Yeah.

What else have you seen?

You've got your eye... OK, well, we've seen the dogs.

There's four little dogs.

I know that Jennie doesn't like them at all, but I just think they're lovely.

What would be the best price on the four dogs?

As a pack, you've got to keep them together... Yeah, OK.

I'll keep them together.

..£10 a dog.

VO: Making 115 together.

What do you think?

How about 75?

I couldn't quite do 75.

We can get it under 100 for you.

If I nipped it down to 90?

86 and we're done.

LYDIA: Go on, then, £86.

JB: 86!

VO: Thanks, Lydia.

(NARRATOR CHUCKLES) Not sure why 86.

We'll never know.

60 for the plates and 26 for the doggies, with 231 left.

Wow.

JB: Bye bye, then.

Thank you very much.

OK. Go carefully.

JB: Woof, woof.

Come on.

RAJ: Woof-woof.

VO: Time now for both of our new pairings to relax and take in the view.

RAJ: You live in this beautiful part of the world.

What brought you here?

It was an advert in Birds magazine, and this advert said, "We have cirl buntings in our cow shed at the tide's edge.

Come and visit."

And I just thought that was beautiful.

So we did.

Anyway, we bought it.

30 years ago, yeah.

And you've been living here ever since.

VO: Sounds delightful.

Now, what about our classic car correspondent?

Are you enjoying the drive?

Oh, I'm in heaven.

I'm having to behave myself, but the temptation to put your right foot down is quite strong.

But it's that lovely roar, isn't it?

Oh!

(ENGINE PURRS) And then you... Oh, isn't that lovely?

It's very nice they give it to you as part of the program, isn't it?

Yeah, but you've got to give it back.

That wasn't what I was told.

(THEY LAUGH) VO: Nighty night.

Next day, our celebrities are reunited with Jennie warming to the Healey.

You seem a little more confident today, Jennie.

I have taken a leaf out of your book which is basically aggression.

(HE LAUGHS) So, just ram those gears in.

But I've got used to the fact that I can't see over the steering wheel.

You're not wearing any shoes.

That's a good move, is it?

VO: Well, whatever works, eh?

There was no soft peddling yesterday, that's for sure, with Jennie and Raj acquiring a vintage radio, a locket, some Clarice Cliff plates and some toy dogs...

If I found them around my house, I'm sorry, I'd put them in the bin.

VO: ..which means she still has £231 still in her wallet, while Simon splashed out on just a companion set and a coronation game.

'Popular portable puzzles proving positively perplexing and perpetually pleasing.'

VO: Leaving 345 for his and Margie's spending needs.

So, how's the relationship shaping up?

Oh, she is lovely, isn't she?

I thought she was lovely and I thought she was part of the team and at the end of the day she's going, "Don't know really why you picked that."

I'm going, "Margie, you're supposed to be Team Simon."

VO: Meanwhile, the experts are having the very same debate.

One of the things she loved doing was haggling.

I have to say, I don't think I've ever had anybody with me that was as good as Jennie.

I said to her, "If you get it for a certain amount, that would be great."

And she didn't even look at me.

She knew exactly what she was doing.

VO: And she came up with some quite surprising numbers.

Now, halfway through the buying expedition, it's time for our journalists to do a bit of investigation.

Here we go.

What on earth are those?

Well, these...these are the ones that I didn't want to buy and I would have put in the bin.

But actually it's quite a nice story.... Looks as though it's got something...

I think that those dogs are going to do rather well, actually.

SIMON: Really?

JB: Yeah.

VO: Cheeky monkey.

SIMON: These are lovely, aren't they?

Yeah, yeah.

They're really nice.

Gosh, you might make money off those if someone doesn't drop them!

Yeah, those are lovely.

Quite a common pattern, the crocus pattern.

(PLATE CLATTERS) Ooh.

Oh, dear!

It'll still sell with a crack.

And a cool, cool radio.

I'm jealous about the radio.

And the locket on top.

I'm a bit worried about the locket.

You...you paid for this, did you?

Do... Are you really unimpressed?

VO: Simon's turn now.

SIMON: Yeah.

There's one item that's not here, but there's this.

Now look, this is from the coronation.

You get your pinball and you try and take it round the route.

So what was that, £2?

No, it was a bit more than that.

That's not true.

I've got a bit of catching up to do.

VO: Plenty of time for that.

SIMON: Come on, Batman!

JB: Ooh!

VO: When our dynamic duo have turned into the Fantastic Four, they'll be seeing a lot more of Devon starting out in Exeter on the River Exe - once a major center of the wool industry and since 2004 the home of the Met Office.

And there's Simon's first shop of the day on the quay.

We've still got lots left to spend in here, remember.

Alongside his trusty expert.

SIMON: Marge.

MC: Mm?

What do you know about compacts?

It's not my strong point.

But there are some rather interesting ones here.

That's enameling which is glass that's crushed to a paste and applied and then fired.

And each color will have a different firing.

SIMON: This one looks a very good nick.

It is because it's terribly easy to chip enamel and once you've chipped it, it's very difficult to repair.

It's silver.

The thing is silver.

And you've got good taste.

VO: Perhaps too good.

£195.

There are a couple of others in here.

This one looks different.

What on earth is that?

Oh, this is going to play a little tune.

MC: This is... SIMON: You're joking.

I think this is a company who work in Budapest.

And if you go like that... (TINKLING MUSIC) SIMON: Ah!

While you're doing your powdering your nose... (FUR ELISE PLAYS) (THEY SING ALONG) We're singing again.

Da-da-da... VO: Delightful.

Don't quite know why I need...

I've just seen the price.

I stopped singing as soon as I saw the price.

VO: Ah, well, it's never easy, this malarkey.

SIMON: Margie, help me.

MC: Yeah?

SIMON: I love my clocks... MC: Yeah.

..and I'm just looking at these, but nothing's shouting at me.

No.

You have clocks at home?

I love clocks.

And I like working out how they work, and if they're not working, trying to make them work.

VO: Well, they do loom large in news broadcasts, I suppose.

SIMON: But one thing that's intrigued me about Roman numeral clocks...

Right?

..the Roman numeral for four is IV.

Yeah.

On a Roman numeral clock, it's always IIII.

Right.

I heard a lovely story that Louis XIV used to design clock faces in his spare time... Really?

..and he got the number wrong and it became the fashion.

Oh!

Which is a lovely story, but I suspect it's not right.

Simon's enjoying himself.

He likes clocks.

So maybe we could find... something that ticks for him?

Ticks the box?

But no, he's lovely company.

Just got to find a few bits that are going to win the day.

Let's triumph.

Let my team triumph.

VO: Margie sounds in a competitive mood.

There was so much out there, but we've just got to find something that...maybe someone's not really spotted its potential.

I'm really struggling.

I've seen what Jennie's got and there's a lot of pressure.

VO: Er...crikey.

Can Margie help?

Right.

MC: Simon.

VO: Oh, hello!

What have you found?

Well, a bit of silver is always OK, isn't it?

Silver cruet, three-piece cruet.

But you've got your hallmarks there.

Mm-hm.

68.

I mean, I'd like to buy it for 45.

We can but ask.

VO: It does look nice, though.

I mean, I like it because... SIMON: I mean, it's useful... MC: It's complete.

SIMON: ..and it's complete.

MC: Yes.

SIMON: And it's...silver.

MC: Yeah.

Do you understand hallmarks?

I don't know what that means, no.

It tells you assay office which is...Birmingham.

And then you've got the date...

Which is?

..which is for 1925.

SIMON: So it's 100 years old.

MC: Yeah, it is 100 years old.

SIMON: Mm.

MC: If we could just... SIMON: Yeah.

..get the price down, I think it might be a possibility.

VO: Worth a try.

The dealer isn't here, but Andy can haggle for her.

Andy.

This silver cruet set in a rather battered old box, it's on at £68.

What would be your best price?

I'm sure she'll do it for 50 for you.

SIMON: 50?

ANDY: Yeah.

We'll have a deal.

VO: Well, that went awfully well!

SIMON: £50.

VO: Now, open sesame!

Place the goods within.

And then, close...firmly.

(SIMON GRUNTS, MARGIE GIGGLES) Oh!

Off we go!

VO: With 295 still to spend.

While Raj explores a bit more of the Devon countryside in the company of a famous local resident.

RAJ: Are you a keen gardener at all?

Oh, yeah.

I spend hours and days and days gardening because we've got five acres.

There's absolutely nothing like going out and cutting some asparagus in early May and eating it five minutes later, it's just fabulous.

And I'm a bit haphazard with my planting.

I just see something...

I like that, shove it in and see what happens.

So I never know what's going to come up in the flowerbeds, really.

VO: Our former Chelsea Flower Show presenter is about to enjoy a treat close to the seaside town of Budleigh Salterton at Bicton Park Botanical Gardens.

JB: I've heard about this place many, many times, but never been here.

VO: Bicton boasts over 64 acres full of the sort of species guaranteed to make any serious gardener go weak at the knees.

JB: I love marigolds and they flower all summer.

VO: And Jennie and Raj are here to find out how they all got here from horticulturalist Caradoc Doy.

If you go back about 200 years before many of these plants we see all around us were introduced, you'll find that really here in the British Isles, we have very few endemic native species of plants and trees.

Most of what we grow in our gardens has come from somewhere else, in particular, North America, South America, Japan and China.

And at the forefront of bringing these plants into the country was a local nursery called Veitch.

How did it all come about?

Well, I suppose the foundations of this garden as we see it today was laid out by James Vietch, an Exeter-based nurseryman who was employed to come and design an arboretum here at Bicton.

And his son continued looking after Bicton.

And it became a very important pioneering nursery introducing tropical plants as well as hardy trees and shrubs.

VO: The five-generation Veitch dynasty - which began here in the early 19th century - was responsible for dispatching several highly-specialized explorers to bring back what Victorian gardeners craved.

Between 1840 and 1912, they sent out 23 plant collectors from this country to go into all corners of the globe looking for new plants for our garden.

And sending out plant collectors in those days was extraordinarily expensive and dangerous.

People would be away for years on end and they may not come back.

In fact, six of the Veitch plant collectors actually died plant collecting, And most of these plants were introduced as seeds or cuttings.

And ironically, if the plant collectors hadn't brought them back here a couple of hundred years ago, they may have been lost in the wild.

Right.

Because it's not very correct or permitted, is it, to bring plants into the country now?

No, it hasn't been for a long time.

But the plant hunting today is all about conservation.

Yeah.

It's about tracking down rare specimens in the wild, finding a way to save them from extinction, propagating them, and then enabling the population to rebuild again.

VO: The Veitch clan's importance to horticulture even extends to a crucial role in a very important institution.

Later on, one of the family, called Harry Veitch, - who was later knighted - Sir Harry Veitch was asked to help organize the Royal International Horticultural Exhibition in 1912.

And he went to the Royal Hospital at Chelsea and asked them whether they would mind the show using the grounds.

The new site was so popular with the general public... Well!

..that's how the Chelsea Flower Show came on to that site.

VO: Another Bicton claim to fame is the Palm House featuring 18,000 handmade panes of glass which predates the one in Kew by several years.

And there's the mighty Wellingtonia trees.

JB: It's fantastic!

It's a redwood, isn't it?

CARADOC: It's the giant redwood.

JB: Yeah.

Sequoiadendron giganteum.

"Giganteum" for obvious reasons.

I mean, look at this one.

We know this one is about 40 meters, or 130 feet tall, and yet it's still a sapling because it's only been here 150-odd years.

Oh, my goodness me!

So, how long would it live and how big would it get?

Well, they can live 2,000 years plus and they can get three times this size.

JB: 2,000 years!

CARADOC: Yeah, plus.

And it's got a big soft bark which protects it from fire because that insulates the wood inside the tree to keep it alive in case there's a forest fire.

JB: Gosh, it's amazing.

So, would the Veitch family have brought a seed or a sapling back?

CARADOC: This is one of the most important Veitch introductions in the whole story of Veitch and, in fact, it was introduced by a chap called William Lobb.

Ah.

He was sent over to North America at the height of the Gold Rush and he found a small grove in California where these particularly large specimens were growing.

And he collected some seeds from cones like this.

And he also dug up a couple of plants and came back to England and introduced a remarkable new tree.

The Duke of Wellington had died only the year before so it became known as the Wellingtonia.

VO: In the USA, they call it the Washingtonia.

The Veitch family introduced over 1,000 new plant species into Britain and we're about to plant some in the shade of the giant redwood.

JB: Well, I think this is a very lovely idea you've come up with.

It's exciting, isn't it?

VO: Starting out with a hydrangea.

JB: Whoa!

This is a beautiful hydrangea.

What have you got?

What have I got?

This is called Visit Our Garden Centre, this one.

(JENNIE LAUGHS) No, it's um...en-ki-anthus.

JB: Enkianthus.

Fantastic flowering shrub.

JB: Isn't that beautiful?

RAJ: It looks beautiful.

That is lovely.

And they're going to grow well here, I think, for many years.

Thank you.

It was a lovely idea.

RAJ: Thank you.

Thank you.

JB: Nice.

VO: Now, let's catch up with our other journalist and expert pairing - the E-Types.

MC: So, have you really enjoyed this trip, Simon?

I've had a wonderful time.

It has sparked something and I will not walk past an antique shop in a way that I might have done in the past because...there are those... (CAR JUDDERS) (MARGIE LAUGHS) Particularly if I can find an E-Type exhaust.

VO: Just one shop still to go and Simon does still have a lot of money left over.

So, what might he yet acquire?

Your next shop is going to be...full of treasures.

It's very scary when you do that.

Yeah.

SIMON: Madam Margie... MC: Yeah.

SIMON: ..and her crystal ball.

MC: Yep.

Whereas cynical Simon is thinking, we're heaping a lot of pressure on to one shop now.

You're a journalist.

You work under pressure, don't you?

Deadlines.

VO: He should be in his element... ..in the Devon village of Hele, where they'll be shopping alongside the rivals, eventually.

MC: Right!

They're not here.

Have you noticed?

So let's get in there.

Use every second.

VO: Yes.

Good to get a moo-ve on!

Let's beat 'em.

Come on!

VO: Sounds like his newshound adrenaline is kicking in.

Clive's the man he could hand his £295 to.

Sharp coat.

Margie, I know it's an umbrella stand, but it's a heavy, solid piece.

Yeah.

And you know what's good about it?

It's useful.

Look at the size of it as well.

Go in anybody's house.

It's also expensive.

VO: Ticket price, £175!

Huh!

A lot of brass.

Get that cheaper and maybe buy something else.

SIMON: Right.

VO: Keen as mustard.

Not quite the place to themselves any longer, though.

RAJ: And here we are.

JB: Hey.

RAJ: This looks a nice, big place.

We've got to find something in here.

JB: Well, I hope so.

VO: Yes.

There's room for all.

231 left for Jennie to spend.

JB: Ooh, this looks er... looks intriguing.

RAJ: Wow.

Some interesting things in here.

What's... A xylophone?

(JENNIE HITS KEYS) No, it's not a xylophone.

I've never seen anything like it.

Nor me.

It's a bit like a small marimba.

What's a marimba?

Well, it's a long one of these, but...not metal.

And I learned to play it for a TV show and I learned to do... (SHE HUMS AMERICA FROM WEST SIDE STORY) And I can't do it on here.

And then I'd do the drums.

Yeah, it was great.

Do it again.

(JENNIE SWEEPS OVER THE KEYS) I love that.

It's got a nice sound, hasn't it?

Can I afford it?

Let's have a look.

RAJ: No!

JB: No, say yes!

It's £2,950.

JB: Could I haggle?

RAJ: Could you haggle?

RAJ: How much do we have?

JB: 230.

You know, even with our negotiating skills, that's going to be a very, very tall order, I think, you know.

JB: Oh, I'm sorry.

We certainly wouldn't be allowed in the Devon area again.

No.

VO: Indeed.

There are limits.

Aha!

We meet again.

SIMON: Ah.

JB: How's it going?

We're just looking at things that might be useful.

I think... Margie's being, "Is it practical?

Might people use it?"

Because we've got more chance of selling it on.

But... JB: That's a tip I hadn't thought of that.

I wish I hadn't told you that!

Alright, I'm off.

JB: I'm on a mission.

SIMON: Good luck.

VO: Ah, well, it's good to share.

And at least he kept schtum about the stick stand.

SIMON: Margie.

MC: Mm?

I know it's not antique... but this says £20.

Yeah?

It's a snooker scoreboard.

If you wanted to buy one new... Yeah.

SIMON: ..a couple of hundred.

MC: Fortune.

So just to... MC: I've sold them before.

SIMON: Have you?

SIMON: And did they sell?

MC: Yeah.

VO: The rules were probably devised by this man, Sir Neville Francis Fitzgerald Chamberlain, in 1875.

20 quid.

I mean, what's not to like?

MC: It's in our budget.

VO: Comfortably!

It has got age to it.

I think it's like mid-20th century that.

SIMON: Yeah.

MC: A bit more.

But it works and it's solid.

Yeah.

These are crucial in any snooker table.

It needs a bit of a dust.

Bit of a dust, bit of a polish.

Yeah.

Yeah, I think we can't lose.

SIMON: Famous last words.

MC: No, no.

VO: Decision time.

BOTH: Clive.

How did we get on?

Have we found something?

We've seen something, haven't we?

We have.

We've seen an umbrella stand.

CLIVE: Oh, yes.

SIMON: Brass.

Very solid.

Very lovely, very expensive.

We've got this...this snooker... MC: Billiard, snooker... SIMON: ..scoring.

Yeah.

So... SIMON: This is £20.

CLIVE: Right.

That's £175.

So could we take both for... £100?

CLIVE: £100... MC: Yeah?

..seems perfect for the pair of them.

Job done.

MC: Get your money out.

SIMON: I'm getting my money out.

CLIVE: Brilliant.

VO: Thanks, Clive.

80 for the stick stand and 20 for the scoreboard.

195 left.

Jennie still has 231, remember.

Oh, Raj, there's some beautiful things here.

There's one that catches my eye.

I love that sapphire ring.

It's...white gold, apparently.

I thought it was silver, but it's white gold.

I mean, it's 14 carat, it says.

Well, it reminds me of Diana's engagement ring which, of course, the Duchess of Cambridge, Kate, wears now very prominently all the time.

Shall I try and get it out?

I would.

I would definitely.

You see, it's blue, which I like.

Sapphire.

I know you like blue.

And it's like shiny, which I like.

Yeah.

It's tiny, unfortunately, so I don't think this is one for me.

VO: It's also £395!

Erm...but I could wear it on my little finger.

It does look nice, I have to say.

I think it's very, very pretty.

On somebody a little more petite than me I think that would be gorgeous.

Way out of our league, though.

It is, but this is where you really have to show your negotiating skills.

And you've shown them to me in abundance so far.

I'll try 150.

Just...when you say 150, put a smile on your face.

OK.

Right.

OK. Ready.

Clive?

VO: This should be fun.

CLIVE: Hi, Jennie.

JB: Hello.

I've fallen in love with a ring.

It's too small for me, actually.

Oh, wow.

Which one?

Well, this one.

Would you take 150 for it?

That's going to be a bit too much of a stretch, I'm afraid.

160?

It's going to have to begin with a two.

Is it?

Think of a number that begins with a two, and it's not 20!

RAJ: Go for it.

JB: 200.

You've said the right words.

JB: Yay!

CLIVE: Perfect.

JB: OK!

RAJ: Well done, Jennie.

VO: This is a bit of a palace coup!

JB: 60, 70, 80... VO: Leaving £31.

Keep your eye on her, Clive.

And it's the auction next.

But what are the plans for this evening?

JB: Do you remember a night in Tokyo?

Would that be the kimonos?

Yes.

You were wearing my kimono, and it was very, very late.

And I think we had actually indulged in most of the mini bar.

And what did we think it was funny to do?

We thought it would be really funny to ring the Buckingham Palace press office, didn't we?

Repeatedly!

We wonder why they didn't like us very much!

(THEY LAUGH) VO: Shut-eye, please!

VO: Auction day is here.

How are we feeling in the Healey?

This is the day of reckoning.

I wasn't nervous.

I am now getting quite nervous about this.

I think we might be in a bit of trouble.

Do you remember the auction of Diana's dresses in New York?

Yes.

Wow.

That was really exciting, wasn't it?

There were some phenomenal bids coming in.

I want to break it to you gently, it's not going to be like that!

Even though you've bought a ring like Diana's, I'm not sure we're going to be getting bids from New York.

I'd like you to because there is a huge part of me that wants you to win this because I think you'd be unbearable if you lose.

VO: Calm down now!

After thoroughly doing Devon, our correspondents are coming to Cornwall and the lovely town of Launceston at The Eagle House Hotel - an 18th-century Grade II listed townhouse where their talon-ted experts await!

Sorry about that.

Ah, bang on time, look.

MC: Ah!

JB: Hello!

SIMON: Here we are.

RAJ: Good morning to you.

JB: Hi.

Wow, well, this is nice.

Isn't this lovely?

I'm curious, really curious as to whether anything I chose - or you chose - is going to make money.

VO: Meanwhile, their purchases have been dispatched to Thomas N Miller of Newcastle.

Selling in the room, on the net and on the phone, auctioneer Guy Macklam is in charge.

Final call.

£30.

I think we're done.

VO: Simon parted with just £205 for his five auction lots.

GUY: The silver cruet set will sell well.

It's complete, it's in the box, it's in nice condition.

And with it being silver, it's always going to be popular.

VO: Jennie spent quite a bit more - 369, also for five lots.

The vintage radio is a good piece, and the real talking point of it obviously is the color of it.

It being white, it's a bit more unusual.

We should get a good price for it.

VO: Exciting.

Now, let's get this party started.

The first lot up is your favorite one.

Oh, it's the tatty dogs!

Can we not call them tatty dogs?

Can we call them collectibles?

MC: Shall we hit it?

RAJ: OK.

Here we go.

VO: Using tech, of course.

So, good dogs or naughty dogs?

30 is the bid.

35.

40 bid.

JB: Oh!

Ooh!

GUY: We're not done yet.

Surely, Internet?

Come along, click the button now at 40.

£40 for the lot, then, all of them to a good home, I hope.

40.

Take five.

45 is bid.

50.

Oh, good Lord!

We're pushing on.

Any advance, Internet bidders?

Come along for the lot, then, 50.

You're thinking.

55.

Don't give up now.

60 bid.

Can I shout at him?

Stop it!

60 quid!

£60.

Buyer on the internet here at 60.

At £60.

(GAVEL) Amazing!

VO: Didn't they do well?

I think Raj might be feeling especially chuffed.

I bow to your knowledge.

I bow to your knowledge.

VO: Simon's little coronation game is next.

Jubilee year, remember.

As I look at it, I realize just what tat it really is!

(THEY LAUGH) Margie, what were we thinking?

12 is the low start.

14, 16 bid.

Nice old thing here.

16, 18, 20 is bid.

There you go.

These are hard to find now.

You didn't see these.

I've got £20 bid.

All done?

Any advance in the room?

£20.

This will be your final call online.

MC: Come on, mate.

GUY: 20.

At £20, we sell to the net.

VO: Not a fortune exactly, but profits are not to be sniffed at.

That's good.

That's 10% on your money.

That's not bad at all.

How do you spell patronizing?

VO: Oh!

Oh, dear!

Jennie's turn.

Can her silver locket also turn a profit?

It's a yellow gold oval double-sided locket, unusual to see double-sided.

And I've got 20 and five, and 30 and five.

Come along, internet.

£35 for the lot then.

JB: Come on!

GUY: All done?

Any advance on the vintage locket?

GUY: 35, 40 bid.

RAJ: One more.

In gold, £40 offered.

All done?

Going at 40.

JB: Go on.

GUY: 45 is bid.

JB: Hey!

RAJ: 45, yes!

Any advance?

At £45.

GUY: Come on, Internet.

JB: Yes?

GUY: At £45, against the net.

JB: 50, go on, oh.

That's a profit.

That's good.

VO: In a modest sort of way.

Things are definitely hotting up.

MC: £5.

JB: A small profit.

Their smiles have gone.

What a shame.

(THEY LAUGH) VO: Simon's biggest buy now - the brass stick stand.

I've bought these before and done alright.

Is it complete or should it have some more things?

What do you mean?

Of course it's complete!

What's these holes here?

That's where you put the umbrella, Jennie.

There shouldn't be holes there!?

(THEY LAUGH) Oh, they've made a boo-boo, have they, they didn't notice the holes!

Nice vintage brass stick stand on the iron base.

Oh, sell it better!

40 is the bid.

Any advance at 40?

Take five elsewhere?

£40.

Any bidding in the room?

Come along in the room.

Bid 40.

45 needed.

GUY: At £40.

MC: Oh, no.

It's Internet.

Your final call, Internet.

At that £40 then, we're selling here.

SIMON: No!

GUY: £40 and done.

MC: Oh, that's not fair.

SIMON: No!

(GAVEL) (JENNIE LAUGHS) You wicked thing!

VO: Crikey!

Their stick stand got stuck.

That's the headline so far.

MC: I'm sorry, love.

SIMON: Right.

We're in trouble now.

VO: Jennie's vintage radio.

Set the dials to profit, please.

I did 11 years of radio, national news.

And this is what it would have played on!

Oh!

I was waiting...!

(THEY LAUGH) 25 is the bid.

Any advance?

GUY: Seems a low start.

JB: It does.

We'd hoped for more.

Oh, come along, Internet.

It's worth a bit more.

£25 for the lot.

Any advance on 25?

No further interest.

At 25, are you bidding at the back, sir?

Come along, have another look.

At £25.

Oh, I'm really sorry.

I'm really surprised.

Put the hammer down, for goodness' sake.

At 25, we sell to the net.

That's quite a lot less than you paid for it, isn't it?

At 30, just in time.

Oh, it's gone to 30.

A final chance, Internet.

The bid is £30, we sell.

VO: Argh!

Oh, that's awful.

Bad.

Painful.

That was very disappointing.

Life is so unfair, isn't it, Margie?

MC: It is.

SIMON: Oh, gosh.

VO: And speaking of good companions - Simon's hearth set.

What does that remind you of?

A piece of wood?

No!

It's the Blue Peter ship, isn't it?

RAJ: No, it's not.

JB: Is it?

I've got 16 bid.

18, 20.

Any advance on only 20?

The galleon, all done.

I'd pinned all my hopes on this!

GUY: Any advance in the room?

MC: Hey, don't stop yet.

Final call, final chance online.

At £20, we sell.

We're not having a good day!

VO: They may wish to sweep that one under the carpet.

Well, the ship was a mitigated disaster.

The only thing I thought might rescue us, so that tells you how much trouble we are now in.

VO: Time now for Jennie's slightly tired Clarice Cliff plates.

I chose these all by myself.

They are a little bit scratched, but that just shows that they've been... RAJ: Used.

JB: ..well used and loved.

35 is the bid.

Any advance on 35?

GUY: 40.

JB: Come on.

Oh, come along, online, £40.

Hoped for more here.

Any advance in the room?

£40 for the lot then.

Are we done?

45.

Slowly getting there.

Come along, Internet.

£45, trickling forward now.

At 45 and done.

VO: Well, that didn't go to plan, did it?

Neither of them is exactly excelling yet.

Win some, lose some, and we're losing rather a lot.

VO: Well, Simon does have this rather handy scoreboard for totting things up.

You'll double your money on this.

If you go to a sports shop and bought one of these, they're hundreds.

RAJ: Absolutely.

GUY: £4 is the bid.

JB: Oh!

Any advance, nearly £4.

I knew there was a four in it.

Six is the bid on the Internet... SIMON: Six?!

GUY: ..for lot number 85.

Struggling forward now.

Come along, Internet.

SIMON: Six!

JB: She's laughing.

Of course she is.

Mounted in brass as well.

10 bid.

It's got to be worth a little bit more than 10.

Come along, online, take 12 surely now?

We're getting an absolute pounding.

Is there any advance, any interest in front?

Nobody else play snooker?

I've got 10.

I've got 12 bid.

Slowly, slowly, slowly, it's going.

Come along, online.

12 is the money.

All done?

Any advance?

At £12 we sell to the net.

BOTH: £12!

Well, you were wrong.

And you were wrong, and you were wrong.

I'm not laughing any more.

VO: Cheer up, Margie.

At least you're all in the same boat.

It's a shame because we've always been good friends for a long time and it would be really silly to fall out over that.

But I think we might!

VO: Well, hold your fire, Simon, because Jennie's biggest buy is next, also her biggest risk.

This is make or break for us.

It is make or break.

Well, you've taken a punt, as they say.

We have, yeah.

What a pretty lot.

And I'm up to £80 on the Internet.

Is there any advance in the room at 80?

I've got £80.

85 just first.

85.

Was it 90?

I've got 85 here.

90 bid in the hand in the air.

90.

MC: It's not fair.

RAJ: Go in tens.

JB: Go on.

GUY: And £95.

Come on, come on!

100 offered.

At £100... You've made three figures.

110 against you.

At 110.

GUY: 120.

JB: Good.

It's still pushing on online.

Come on, don't give up now.

No, don't give up.

At £130.

I'm still 70 down.

Don't worry, don't worry.

135, we're struggling.

JB: Oh!

RAJ: Come on, come on.

135.

There we go.

140 bid.

It's still going.

145 if you wish?

At £140... JB: No!

GUY: And the phone is out.

I've got 140 on the Internet.

Your final chance, Internet, at 140.

VO: Wow.

Someone's going to be wearing a very nice and very reasonably-priced ring.

Aw!

MC: Everybody, buy your jewelry at auction because that would be hundreds, 400 or 500 in a jewelry shop.

VO: The last lot - Simon's silver cruet set.

The auctioneer is a fan.

This is lovely.

SIMON: There's a lot of hot air around.

Actually, I must say, it's complete.

The liners are all in there which is very important.

The blue liners.

Still in the nice fitted box.

Look at that.

40 is the bid.

Straight away, the bidder on the Internet at £40.

All nice and silver.

GUY: 40, five, 50.

JB: Oh!

A presentation piece.

Look at that, please, at £50 for the lot.

Trying to get more, come along.

MC: Come on!

At £50.

This will be your final chance.

GUY: At £50.

JB: Come on, somebody.

JB: Do it for Simon.

SIMON: Please.

..£50.

There you go.

You were spot-on, Margie.

VO: A nice "steady Eddie" sort of finish.

I think we beat you, Jennie.

I think "win" is quite a strong term.

VO: Oh, dear.

Jennie and Raj began with £400 and, after auction costs, made quite a big loss.

And so, they've ended up with £293.40.

While Simon and Margie, who also started out with 400, made also, after costs, a slightly smaller loss, which means they have won with £311.44.

Now, there's just time for an "And finally..." As I predicted, you were fearsomely competitive and I just hope we can stay friends.

I think we can, Simon.

I think we can, despite it all.

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