[UPBEAT MUSIC] [CAR HONK] NARRATOR: The nation's favorite celebrities-- Ooh.

Just want to touch bass.

NARRATOR: --paired up with an expert-- Boo!

Woo!

NARRATOR: --and a classic car.

No hands.

NARRATOR: Their mission, to scour Britain for antiques.

My office now!

NARRATOR: The aim, to make the biggest profit at auction, but it's no easy ride.

[CAR CRANKS] Who will find the hidden gem?

[BEEPING] Love that.

NARRATOR: Who will take the biggest risk?

This could end in disaster.

NARRATOR: Will anybody follow expert advice?

But I love this.

Why would you buy something you're not gonna use?

[CHUCKLES] NARRATOR: There will be worthy winners and valiant losers.

No, I don't want to shake hands.

NARRATOR: Put your pedal to the metal.

Ah, let me get out of first gear.

NARRATOR: This is the "Celebrity Antiques Road Trip".

[THEME SONG] MAN: Yeah.

NARRATOR: Today, we're in the South of England with showbiz best pals and co-stars of radio for sitcom "Potting On".

It's all around entertainer, Pam Ayres, and esteemed actor, Geoffrey Whitehead.

GEOFFREY WHITEHEAD: Now what could be nicer than being driven around the Hampshire countryside by Pat Ayres in an MG?

I mean, do we have to bother with any antiques?

NARRATOR: Yes, you jolly well do.

[CHUCKLES] It's not called "Celebrity Antiques Road Trip" for nothing, you know.

The nation's favorite poet, Pam, has been at the top of her game for over 40 years after getting her big break on "Opportunity Knocks".

Now there is a show.

Best selling author, Pam, is starting this road trip at the helm of this dark blue 1975 MGBT.

I used to have one of those.

GEOFFREY WHITEHEAD: Is it taking you back, Pam?

I had one of these in 1977 and it was the-- oh, gee.

GEOFFREY WHITEHEAD: [CHUCKLES] It was the pinnacle-- and let me get out of first gear.

GEOFFREY WHITEHEAD: Here we go.

It was the pinnacle of my aspirations.

NARRATOR: Me too.

Seasoned actor, Geoffrey, trained at RADA alongside the likes of Jon Thor and Tom Courtney and went on to become a star of radio, film, theater and TV.

It turns out that Geoffrey has a slight advantage on this road trip.

Your partner's someone who is, ah-- well, listen.

There's no other way to disguise it, Pam, a dealer.

A dealer?

GEOFFREY WHITEHEAD: Yes, but-- See, I think this is altogether unfair.

GEOFFREY WHITEHEAD: But-- What are you looking for in your expert, Geoffrey?

Help.

Oh, you want somebody supportive?

GEOFFREY WHITEHEAD: Yeah.

Ideally, steamingly handsome?

NARRATOR: Well, Pam, your luck may be in as joining you, both on this trip, are two seasoned antiquers, the good looking, James Braxton, and the delightful, Kate Bliss, who are motoring along in this impressive smooth Rolls-Royce silver chavern.

JAMES BRAXTON: What a beautiful car.

How are you finding it?

Do you know, I could handle driving to work in this every day.

JAMES BRAXTON: [LAUGHS] If you don't mind, I'd really-- she's been a great heroine of mine.

I'd love to go with Pam Ayres.

Well, that's absolutely fine-- JAMES BRAXTON: Is that all right?

--because I would love to go with Geoffrey.

JAMES BRAXTON: [INAUDIBLE] Pam Ayres it is.

The only problem is Pam Ayres may not want to go with me.

Well, there is that.

[LAUGHS] There is that, James.

NARRATOR: Once paired up, our teams will kick off this rip-roaring road trip with 400 pounds in their pockets.

Starting in Sparsholt, Winchester, they'll then be buying up in Berkshire and Hampshire before heading to Cirencester in Gloucestershire for auction.

Oh, here we go with an MG. - Yeah, look at that.

- Woohoo.

JAMES BRAXTON: Very smart, isn't it?

A very pretty car, isn't it?

KATE BLISS: Great.

JAMES BRAXTON: Oh, congratulations.

KATE BLISS: You're arriving in style.

JAMES BRAXTON: You're Pam Ayres.

Hello, very nice to meet you.

James.

PAM AYRES: Hello.

Pam.

[INAUDIBLE] get in there?

NARRATOR: Partner's pre-picked by our experts, they're ready to pair up.

Would you like me to drive, Geoffrey, to start off?

- Please, I'm in your hands.

- Yes?

Come on round then.

- Yes.

It's a long way down.

Oh, it is a long way down, isn't it?

NARRATOR: And hit the road.

They're off.

NARRATOR: And so should you be.

Get going, then.

GEOFFREY WHITEHEAD: Well, this is more like it.

It's such a relief to get out of that MG. [CHUCKLES] It's like being trapped in a pilchard tin.

[CONTINUES CHUCKLING] [CAR CRANKING] JAMES BRAXTON: I haven't quite got my gears yet.

I'm very pleased to see you struggling because I struggled as well.

KATE BLISS: Do you like driving?

GEOFFREY WHITEHEAD: Not really.

Um, I started my career in Z cars and I couldn't drive in a Ford Zephyr.

And a man called Stan Hollingsworth used to lie on the floor and actually work the pedals and the clutch and I would steer it, you know.

- Really?

- Yeah.

KATE BLISS: So you weren't driving?

No.

I think they'll be stiff rivals, won't they?

Yeah, I think you'll be-- gonna box clever, James.

I think you'll box clever.

NARRATOR: For that first pit stop, Pam and James are heading to Hungerford in Berkshire.

PAM AYRES: I feel that Geoffrey has got a vast knowledge, which is gonna be very difficult for me to compete with.

JAMES BRAXTON: Kate's very competitive as well.

It's good to just sort of gently sow doubting seeds.

Ah, yes.

You know, we can tell them about a sleeper.

A sleeper?

JAMES BRAXTON: A sleeper.

Well, tell me more.

JAMES BRAXTON: Sleeper is a sort of little treasure that lies undiscovered.

NARRATOR: Well, hopefully, there may be some sleepers hiding in their first shop of the day, Hungerford Arcade.

And we hop.

PAM AYRES: Right.

JAMES BRAXTON: After you.

So eyes-- but eyes peeled.

My goodness.

Gee, where do you start?

JAMES BRAXTON: Well, I think the great rule of thumb is the Princess Margaret school of keep walking, never stop.

Just process slowly-- Right.

-and take it all in.

Oh.

And then only stop when need be.

Is that what she did?

Yeah.

OK, we'll do the same.

Let's proceed.

So what are we looking for?

That reminds me of Dubai of the gold souks there.

JAMES BRAXTON: Ah.

PAM AYRES: But I'm not looking for any gold because I've only got 400 quid.

JAMES BRAXTON: In these troubled times, gold is soaring, isn't it?

I like this little tea set.

I had one a bit like it at home, and I think that's very sweet.

Would it be stupid of me to buy that, do you think?

Of course, it wouldn't.

PAM AYRES: No?

JAMES BRAXTON: Well, how much is it?

PAM AYRES: It's 8.50.

JAMES BRAXTON: Well, it doesn't seem too expensive, does it?

Yeah, it doesn't.

I think it's very sweet.

So you're a lady-- you're a decision maker, aren't you?

Yeah.

So you leap straight in?

PAM AYRES: I like that tea set, that child's tea set.

I think it has a great charm.

Right, OK.

So we'll-- - Should we-- - --try and get that, shall we?

Should we try and get that?

I-- [STUTTERS] Pam, brilliant.

What do I have to do, then?

- I think we have-- - What do I have to do now?

Rather-- Do I get the man by the throat or do I go and choose some other things?

NARRATOR: She doesn't mess about, does she?

- Hello.

- Hello.

JAMES BRAXTON: Hello.

Hello, hello, James.

- Nice to meet you, Ian - Ian.

- Hello, Ian.

- Hello.

Hello, Ian.

Is this where I have to be hard-nosed?

Yeah, you have very hard-nosed.

[CHUCKLES] And I like this-- I like this little dinky tea set.

JAMES BRAXTON: Can we examine it first?

Yes, certainly.

Can my expert scrutinize it?

Ian.

PAM AYRES: I think it's pretty, and I like pretty China.

JAMES BRAXTON: Oh, it's not that old.

Look, I can feel it.

And we've got a clear mark in there because the Victorian ones were generally made in Stoke-upon-Trent, Staffordshire.

Right.

JAMES BRAXTON: And they would have been quite clumsy in their manufacture.

It's bone China.

It's none of your rubbish.

JAMES BRAXTON: We've got to start somewhere.

PAM AYRES: We're gonna start somewhere.

At least we're starting, that's the main thing.

And I'm tasked with getting the best possible price for it, so-- Well, the current price is 8 pounds 50.

PAM AYRES: Yeah.

IAN: And I know the dealer, James.

Yes.

So I might be able to give him a quick call and see if he can squeeze a little bit more off.

NARRATOR: A decisive start there from Pam as Ian heads off to try and broker a deal.

Shall we have a look at some of the things while we are negotiating-- well, while we're negotiating with James?

Well, time is money, isn't it?

Time is money, absolutely.

- Time is money.

- Yeah.

Busy people.

Look, jewelry, nice jewelry.

Expensive though for our purposes, isn't it?

NARRATOR: While Pam and James carry on hunting in Hungerford, Geoffrey and Kate have motored their way to Reading where they're arriving at their first shop of the day.

Fanny's.

Fanny's Antiques.

GEOFFREY WHITEHEAD: Yes.

KATE BLISS: Look at that.

My world.

KATE BLISS: So here we go, first shop.

Yes, plenty to look at.

Yeah.

God, it's stuffed in here.

GEOFFREY WHITEHEAD: Wow.

NARRATOR: Indeed.

One of Reading's longest running antiques havens has plenty of collectibles for Geoffrey to get his teeth into.

KATE BLISS: So what about ceramics, Geoffrey?

- Ah-- - Do you like these?

Well, no, I don't think so.

I think pottery, that is Pam's department.

KATE BLISS: Isn't it?

GEOFFREY WHITEHEAD: I think so.

KATE BLISS: You think that would be a Pam piece?

That's right up Pam's street, isn't it?

Is It?

Yes, look at it.

So actually, that's-- Quite hideous.

NARRATOR: He doesn't hold back, does he?

GEOFFREY WHITEHEAD: Ah, the old Cruet.

Yeah, what do you think of it?

GEOFFREY WHITEHEAD: Shall we have a look underneath?

Yeah, I'll tell you what-- If I hold it up.

Yeah, I love it.

Now don't drop it, Geoffrey.

No.

KATE BLISS: James Deakin and it's Sheffield.

Hey, it's from your neck of the woods.

GEOFFREY WHITEHEAD: Well, that settles it.

I mean, [CHUCKLES] that's fantastic.

KATE BLISS: I would say that is Edwardian in dates.

OK. KATE BLISS: Oh, do you know what, Geoffrey?

GEOFFREY WHITEHEAD: Mm-hmm.

KATE BLISS: There's a bit of damage on there.

Oh, yeah, that's a bad crack, isn't it?

I'm not buying damaged goods.

OK. - Is that a flat-- - I think-- A flat no?

I'm afraid so, Sheffield and all.

KATE BLISS: I agree.

NARRATOR: While Geoffrey and Kate continue to browse, back in Hungerford, Pam and James are waiting for an answer from Ian on the children's tea set.

JAMES BRAXTON: Here's our man.

- Hello, again.

- Hello, again.

- Hello.

Yeah, come on.

PAM AYRES: What did James say?

IAN: I spoke to him and he said you could have it for 5 pounds.

PAM AYRES: For 5 pounds, I will accept.

Thank you very much.

That's very kind.

[INTERPOSING VOICES] This was my first purchase, and it's been an absolute, undiluted joy.

OK. NARRATOR: Hasn't she got a lovely way with words?

Anything else grab you, Pam?

Teddy-- teddies are worth a lot of money, aren't they?

They can be, yeah.

The right teddy can be worth a lot of money.

PAM AYRES: Is this the right teddy, do you think?

JAMES BRAXTON: I don't know.

Is it straw filled?

Hello, teddy.

Well, he looks rather a nice teddy.

What does he cost?

He costs-- Quite big, isn't he?

Let's have a look, 120 pounds.

Wow.

Oh, he's rather nice.

- He is.

- Aren't you?

Is he straw filled?

Does he crunch?

He does crunch a bit, doesn't he?

PAM AYRES: Is that good?

It's good.

Oh, what a nice boy you are.

NARRATOR: Up until the 1920s, most teddies were stuffed with wood shavings giving a straw-like feel.

What about his eyes, are these glassy eyes?

I think they're plastic.

Yeah, I think they are.

I don't think they're original.

JAMES BRAXTON: He's-- he's getting a bit bold, isn't he?

He's been loved.

PAM AYRES: Yeah.

Do you think I'm daft, though, because I don't know anything about antiques?

I just know what I like, and I quite like him.

NARRATOR: Well, Pam certainly seems smitten.

Best get Ian back over.

He's 120 pounds.

Oh, OK. Do you think it's all right to buy him, James?

Because I'm on very thin ice here.

Not at 120.

No.

Not at 120, my expert says.

No, that's because they're a lot less.

PAM AYRES: My expert's a really esteemed expert in the field of teddy bears.

Well, if you hand the teddy bear to me, I'll see what I can do.

You're a good man.

JAMES BRAXTON: Thank you, setting me up for a fall there.

It's a nice teddy.

You know, I'd be all over it if it was 30 quid.

Well, yeah.

But it's just not, is it?

No.

It's 120, so it's a grown up decision to make.

OK. NARRATOR: Right, Ian, what's the news?

IAN: I spoke to the dealer and-- and she's such a fan of you both.

Oh.

She said you can have it for 75 pounds.

75 pounds?

I'll have to consult with my expert on this.

What do you think, James?

Well, I think-- I think it's a good price.

Do you?

Yeah.

PAM AYRES: Well, I'm inclined to go for it.

I would concur.

OK, we'd like to buy the teddy bear.

OK.

Shake his hands.

Oh, look at that, shake his-- shake his hands.

IAN: And then you shake his hands.

JAMES BRAXTON: Thank you.

- It's very nice.

- It's a deal.

- I like him.

It's a deal.

PAM AYRES: It's a deal.

NARRATOR: That shake at the paw means they've spent a total of 80 pounds on two items in her very first shop.

[ENGINE REVVING AND CRANKING] It doesn't sound very healthy, does it?

A bit of a thump out.

[ENGINE CRANKING] Oh, gee.

NARRATOR: Ah.

Although their shopping is off to a flying start, it looks like their road trip has ground to a halt.

All right.

Well, with great regret, we'll leave Ted, Big Ted.

Anyway, it's very good for the figure, isn't it?

It's very good for the figure.

JAMES BRAXTON: Very good for the figure, Pam.

NARRATOR: Let's hope Geoffrey's having better luck back in Reading.

I've seen something that I might like, but I need a closer look at it.

Would you come with me?

- Yeah.

GEOFFREY WHITEHEAD: It looks good.

NARRATOR: Uh-huh, it looks like a set of shutters have caught Geoffrey's eye.

GEOFFREY WHITEHEAD: This is French or it says it's French.

Yeah.

Shutter, 19th century.

Yeah, could well be.

Would you like a closer look at it?

KATE BLISS: Yeah, that sounds-- GEOFFREY WHITEHEAD: Squeeze by.

KATE BLISS: I'll tell you what I like.

I like the fact that it's still got the original iron work on it, that latch there.

That can't be faked, can it?

KATE BLISS: No.

And the hinges, I mean, it certainly looks like it's got some age to it.

It could be from a French gite.

I don't think it's quite classy enough for a Chateau.

GEOFFREY WHITEHEAD: When we go abroad to [SPEAKING FRENCH] and all these places in the south of [INAUDIBLE] the [INAUDIBLE] in Paris, you see a lot of this stuff.

And I just love it, you know.

It's so reminiscent of all those trips and the nice sort of holidays and searching for goods and things.

And it just speaks to me.

It's got-- got something, hasn't it?

KATE BLISS: Mhm, it certainly has.

So what's the damage?

GEOFFREY WHITEHEAD: But the damage-- KATE BLISS: Mhm.

250.

OK. GEOFFREY WHITEHEAD: I wouldn't want to give more than 150 for it, really.

NARRATOR: Right, best bargaining head on, Geoffrey.

Let's see if you can seal a deal with the top dog, Will.

We've seen something that we rather like or I'd rather like anyway, the French shutter.

WILL: And what's the price on it?

Its 250, which, um-- 250.

It's a little high for us, you know.

Can you do me anything on that?

WILL: About 200 springs to mind.

KATE BLISS: We were sort of thinking-- the sort of 100 to 150, weren't we?

Yeah.

If you could come and meet us somewhere where you're happy.

175?

Well, that sounds-- yeah, that sounds acceptable.

GEOFFREY WHITEHEAD: Yeah.

KATE BLISS: You happy?

GEOFFREY WHITEHEAD: Yeah, I think we're all happy.

OK. - OK, then.

We're happy all round.

WILL: Good.

GEOFFREY WHITEHEAD: Thank you.

Great.

Thank you, Will.

Yep, my pleasure.

We got our first item.

Indeed.

NARRATOR: That pricey purchase means Geoffrey's blown almost half his budget on just one item, and in his first shop too.

KATE BLISS: OK.

Right.

Onwards and upwards.

Yes, with a lot of our money gone.

Oh, dear.

[ENGINE REVVING] Goodbye, Fanny's.

KATE BLISS: Off we go.

NARRATOR: Back with Pam and James, they're taking a break from shopping and heading south to Middle Wallop in Hampshire.

In her younger years, Pam was in the RAF, so James has brought her to the Museum of Army Flying to find out about a regiment with the briefest of histories that helped win World War II.

They're meeting museum curator, Susan Lindsay, to find out more.

Welcome.

Please come in.

Thank you.

NARRATOR: This year marks the 75th anniversary of the formation of the British Glider Pilot Regiment.

With a motto of nothing is impossible, the unit's airborne assaults during the Second World War played an important part in the Allied forces winning the war.

PAM AYRES: Susan, I lived near the old airfield [INAUDIBLE] in Gloucestershire, and I know lots of gliders went from there during the Second World War.

Why gliders?

SUSAN LINDSAY: Well, gliders were a really effective way of delivering large numbers of troops, equipment and supplies for airborne operations.

And because they didn't have engines, they were silent and therefore, they provided an element of surprise.

NARRATOR: The military use of gliders was a German invention.

Following the end of World War I, the Treaty of Versailles peace settlement prohibited Germany from having a powered Air Force.

So they turned, instead, to gliders to train pilots.

Germany went on to use gliders with great success during the early stages of the Second World War, prompting Churchill to call for the formation of a British glider force.

SUSAN LINDSAY: The Glider Pilot Regiment was formed in February 1942 and the pilots were drawn from volunteers across the army.

Why the army?

I would have thought they'd scour the Air Force.

SUSAN LINDSAY: Well, there was some squabbling when the unit was first set up about whether or not the pilots should be army or Air Force.

But the nature of a glider operation is that it's in effect one way.

So the pilot has to land the glider and then get out and fight alongside the troops he's brought into battle.

So it was better that he was a soldier rather than just a pilot.

NARRATOR: Various gliders were used by the Allied forces, but the Airspeed Horsa was Britain's primary combat glider, which could carry around 28 soldiers and two Jeeps.

Towed into the air by high powered aircraft, the gliders would cut loose their tethers once near their target and make controlled crash landing.

PAM AYRES: So Susan, this is a Horsa glider.

The cockpit is angled towards us, kind of hinged at the ear.

Is that how you loaded it and then you close the top like a tin lid?

SUSAN LINDSAY: Absolutely.

This is actually a Mark II.

The Mark I Gliders had a large door on the side with a ramp and they had to load them that way.

And then if you wanted to unload them, you might have to use explosives ring to take the tail off.

Obviously, that was unreliable and quite inefficient.

So for the Mark II, they developed a cockpit that opened like a door and you could load it from the front.

PAM AYRES: How nice and what an ungainly looking contraption.

JAMES BRAXTON: What was the first mission they were used in?

SUSAN LINDSAY: Well, the first operation that Horsas were used on was called Operation Freshmen.

And this was an operation to try and disable a heavy water plant in the Mork in Norway.

And the reason why that was a target was because heavy water could be used to develop an atomic bomb.

And two Horsa Gliders were used on that operation.

But sadly, very poor weather conditions meant that all aircraft involved crashed, and those who weren't killed during the crash were captured and subsequently executed by the Germans.

Did the Horsa Gliders go on to be considered a success in the end?

SUSAN LINDSAY: They did.

It was used in a number of different other operations right up until 1945.

But probably one of the best known is the capture of the bridge at Arnhem, and that was really part of a very ambitious plan to try and drive XXX Corps into Germany to try and finish the war in 1944.

And gliders were involved in landing troops and equipment.

And in fact, the bridge was captured and it was held for four Days.

But for a variety of reasons, the Allied troops were overwhelmed by German opposition.

And in the end, they had to withdraw.

1,300 glider pilots were involved in that operation and only approximately 700 came back.

PAM AYRES: Oh.

So they made a massive contribution then, Susan, but at tremendous cost.

They made a massive contribution in what was a very new way of delivering troops.

And you're right, at a great loss.

NARRATOR: Gliders were never flown operationally after the Second World War with remaining members of the regiment retrained as light aircraft pilots.

But the glider unit will forever be remembered for their role in helping win the war, reminding us all nothing is impossible.

Back on the open road, Geoffrey and Kate are heading towards their second shop of the day in Eversley in Hampshire.

Have you always wanted to be an actor?

No.

I was at school, and the usual story, a very enlightened schoolmaster said I'm doing a play at the end of term, "Saint Joan", and I'd very much like you to play Saint Joan.

[LAUGHTER] Yeah, and I quite enjoyed it.

[CONTINUED LAUGHTER] And then a couple of years later, he said, I'd like you to do "Hamlet".

So I did "Hamlet".

And then he said, have you thought of doing this for a living?

And I hadn't really.

And he said, try for rather.

And 50 odd years later-- [CHUCKLES] Here you are.

I'm still doing it.

NARRATOR: And we're mighty glad you are.

Geoffrey and Kate have arrived at their final shop of the day, Eversley Barn Antiques What do you think?

It looks good, doesn't it?

Oh, my word.

NARRATOR: Housed inside this 16th century barn are a wide variety of antiques, furniture and collectibles.

Can't I have a look at those chandeliers as we came in?

Ooh, OK. GEOFFREY WHITEHEAD: Nice.

You see that's all glass, but of course, they're more fancier.

Yeah.

210, yeah.

You got expensive taste, Geoffrey.

[SIGHS AND CHUCKLES] NARRATOR: Remember, you've only got 225 pounds left to play with and you've only bought one item so far.

KATE BLISS: What do you think of that?

GEOFFREY WHITEHEAD: Yeah, I mean, for your "Radio Times" and all the rest, yes.

Yeah, magazine rack.

Yeah.

KATE BLISS: Bamboo.

GEOFFREY WHITEHEAD: Yes, sort of made to look a bit like torture.

[CHUCKLES] Yeah, exactly that, but with a basket weave base.

But in good condition.

The thing I like about it-- Attractive.

KATE BLISS: --these little gilt tops just finish it off nicely.

GEOFFREY WHITEHEAD: Yes, they do.

It's an attractive item.

KATE BLISS: You do see a few of these around.

But I have to say, I haven't seen one as nice as this.

It's just got a little bit of quality about it.

Yes, it has.

That might be something to think about.

What do you think?

Yes, certainly.

NARRATOR: The Edwardian bamboo magazine rack is banked for later.

Anything else?

GEOFFREY WHITEHEAD: Napoleon-- KATE BLISS: Ooh.

GEOFFREY WHITEHEAD: --memorabilia, yeah.

It's a pipe temper, you know.

Yes.

They sort of push it down.

Push the tobacco down into the pipe ball.

GEOFFREY WHITEHEAD: Which isn't really what I'm interested in.

Anything to do with Napoleon is-- you know, there are people out there that collect everything to do with him.

And I think that's a nice little buy.

KATE BLISS: Yeah, he's quite small.

He's small.

But-- well, it can be, you know, he was small.

[LAUGHTER] I believe-- I'm told.

KATE BLISS: And he's rather fun, isn't he?

Yes, I like him.

KATE BLISS: And I think he's, probably, late Victorian, if not Edwardian.

Oh, really?

KATE BLISS: I wouldn't say it's the finest casting in the world.

GEOFFREY WHITEHEAD: Oh, well.

KATE BLISS: Actually for 28, you know, it's a nice affordable little-- It's just screaming to be bought.

Mhm.

I tell you what?

While we're at it, I rather like that pocket knife.

Yeah?

KATE BLISS: What do you think about that?

GEOFFREY WHITEHEAD: Oh, yeah, like a fish, isn't it?

You know-- - It is.

Yes.

Do you like little pocket knives, fruit knives?

Yes.

And it's in good-- you know, there's no damage on the-- KATE BLISS: No.

You know, it's a lovely little silver blade, nicely hallmarked little crown.

Can you see it?

GEOFFREY WHITEHEAD: Of course.

KATE BLISS: It's for Sheffield, 1984, 1985, something like that.

Right, excellent.

Lovely little antique piece, carved mother of pearl.

I think that's sweet.

GEOFFREY WHITEHEAD: I like that and I like Napoleon.

And I want to go to bed.

[LAUGHS] You-- you've had enough?

Are you telling me you've had enough?

NARRATOR: Hang on, there's some buying to be done before bedtime.

Let's just hope Hilary can do a dream deal.

With the Edwardian bamboo magazine rack, priced at 75 pounds, the Victorian brass pipe temper at 28 and the Edwardian fruit knife priced at 33, that's a combined ticket price of 136 pounds.

GEOFFREY WHITEHEAD: What do you say on all three?

Well, I could probably do 60 on the magazine rack.

GEOFFREY WHITEHEAD: Yes.

This Napoleon fellow?

HILARY CRAVEN: 23 on him.

GEOFFREY WHITEHEAD: That's up to 83.

KATE BLISS: Mm-hmm.

- 83.

Well, we can probably do 25 on that one.

GEOFFREY WHITEHEAD: That's 108.

KATE BLISS: Mm-hmm.

HILARY CRAVEN: What about a nice-- What about 105, how about that?

How does that sound?

KATE BLISS: I was hoping for about 80.

Oh, my word.

Whoa.

I was thinking 100 was top whack, really.

Really?

I think 100 is very good.

Geoffrey's happy.

I am happy.

- Well, I'm happy.

- Good.

You're happy.

- That's a deal then, 100.

- Splendid.

Thank you very much.

GEOFFREY WHITEHEAD: Thank you.

NARRATOR: Hey, so ends a very successful first day of shopping for Geoffrey and Kate with four items already bagged for auction.

Time now for our weary celebrities and experts to have a well-earned rest.

So nighty, night.

It's the next morning.

Pam and Geoffrey are back together and making their way to West Wellow to meet their experts.

PAM AYRES: Did you have a good day yesterday?

Did you buy things of no value?

Probably.

[LAUGHTER] I've bought something which is either going to be an inspired purchase-- Yes.

--or an absolute catastrophe.

My experience of antiques is that it's usually the latter-- Catastrophe.

[LAUGHS] --of those two choices.

JAMES BRAXTON: How did you get on with Geoffrey?

He's lovely.

He's a Superman.

And you know, he really needs his antiques.

JAMES BRAXTON: Does he?

Pam goes straight in, very decisive, warms up the-- the seller and then goes in for the jugular.

Really?

Yes.

So she's a lady on a mission?

She is.

Victory is mine, Kate!

KATE BLISS: There's nothing like being uber confident there, is there?

Well, you know, it's gonna go one of two ways.

[CHUCKLES] I'm either gonna win or I'm gonna lose.

NARRATOR: Time shall soon tell, Mr. Braxton.

Geoffrey and Kate have already bagged four items, the 19th century French door shutters, the Napoleon brass pipe temper, the Edwardian bamboo magazine rack and the fruit knife from the same period.

KATE BLISS: You've got expensive taste, Geoffrey.

NARRATOR: Leaving them 125 pounds to spend today.

While James and Pam have only bought two things so far, the children's porcelain tea set and the teddy bear.

And what a nice boy you are.

NARRATOR: Which means they have 320 pounds still to spend.

As their car went kaput yesterday, we found them a new one, which Pam is finding a tad confusing.

I've turned the wrong-- Is it raining now?

[LAUGHTER] NARRATOR: Not the best of starts.

Here it comes.

Ooh, we've got a green one.

A little green fellow.

- Ooh.

- Isn't it smart?

And it's a little bit [INAUDIBLE].. And it actually works.

Rubber bumper, a bit later.

Good morning, good morning.

- Good morning.

- Hi.

How are you?

Hello, James.

Good morning, Pam.

PAM AND JAMES: Good morning.

Shall we get into the car?

Oh, right.

Come on, Pam, let's go.

Let's go.

- Happy shopping.

The last one to the shops is a bad egg.

NARRATOR: [CHUCKLES] And they're off.

This morning, Geoffrey and Kate will start their shopping in Ringwood, Hampshire.

So who have you worked with, Geoffrey, that you most admire in the acting world?

Ooh, he can't say anybody's better than another.

As to people I admire, somebody like Vanessa Redgrave.

So have you worked with Vanessa Redgrave?

I have.

I did a love-- Have you?

- I did a love scene with her.

- Really?

Yes.

Why, so up close and personal?

Indeed.

KATE BLISS: (GASPS) How was that?

I was nervous.

Leaned in for the, you know, the kiss and I became aware of a rustling sound.

Suddenly, a small, furry head appeared from between her bosoms.

Oh.

And it turned out to be a ferret, and it gave the scene a certain intensity which maybe it lacked before.

NARRATOR: Right.

From finding ferrets to finding bargains, and they've arrived at Lorraine Tarrant Antiques.

Lorraine's, well, let's take Lorraine by storm.

Yeah, lets.

My sweet, Lorraine.

NARRATOR: Housed in an old staple off the marketplace, this shop sells all sorts of antiques and collectibles.

[CREAKING] Ooh.

Ooh, hello.

Was that you, Geoffrey?

No!

How dare you.

[CHUCKLES AND CUPBOARD CREAKING] Ooh.

I told you not to have those fish and chips last night.

Squeaky cupboard.

Mm-hmm.

Gosh it's crammed in here, isn't it?

GEOFFREY WHITEHEAD: Good, Lord, yes.

Ah, no, this cupboard, look.

Baccarat decanter?

KATE BLISS: Yeah, decanter's aren't particularly buoyant at the moment.

GEOFFREY WHITEHEAD: OK. What about the scent bottle at the back?

KATE BLISS: There is.

I've-- yeah, many scent bottles are becoming more and more collectible-- OK. --even, you know, the not so old ones.

GEOFFREY WHITEHEAD: Well, it's Guerlain, is it?

KATE BLISS: It's Guerlain, French.

NARRATOR: It certainly is one of the world's oldest perfume houses.

It dates back to 1828 when master perfumer, Guerlain, created fragrances for the rich and famous including Queen Victoria.

KATE BLISS: Got the lovely blue luster-- Yeah, yeah.

--stopper.

They're sort of a very classic design.

Stopper's all in nice condition by the look of things.

Yeah.

KATE BLISS: It's missing its little label.

GEOFFREY WHITEHEAD: Should there something there?

KATE BLISS: Mhm, there should be a little gold paper label-- GEOFFREY WHITEHEAD: You can still use that-- KATE BLISS: --with the name.

Mhm.

GEOFFREY WHITEHEAD: I like the color and it's lovely, isn't it?

KATE BLISS: Yeah.

NARRATOR: It's expensive, priced at 145 pounds.

But there's a reason for that.

WOMAN: It's not just a scent bottle.

It's a Shalimar scent bottle.

Ooh.

And it's Baccarat.

NARRATOR: Another famous French company, Baccarat, has produced fine glass for over 250 years.

It's definitely '40s.

It may be a little bit before that.

NARRATOR: So while they continue sniffing around the perfume bottle, Pam and James are making their way to their first shop in Winnal in Winchester.

So we might find one of your elusive sleepers when we go to our next shop.

Sleeper, that's what we need.

I like the term.

Funny enough, Pam.

PAM AYRES: Yeah.

JAMES BRAXTON: I have written a small limerick-- Have you there, James?

--that includes a sleeper.

PAM AYRES: [CHUCKLES] Right.

JAMES BRAXTON: There was a lady called Ayres who never carried no airs.

Sleeper's she sought, but teddy she bought and burnt clutches unawares.

It wasn't me who burnt the clutch.

JAMES BRAXTON: [LAUGHS] Never let the facts get in the way of a good story.

[INTERPOSING VOICES] - --a good rhyme.

- OK?

No, absolutely.

NARRATOR: Unfortunately, that was nothing like a good story, James.

Right.

They've arrived at Molly's Den with 320 pounds burning a hole in their pockets.

JAMES BRAXTON: This is our second shop.

I know, damn right.

Good luck.

Let's go and see what we can find.

JAMES BRAXTON: Let's get in there.

NARRATOR: This vintage and antiques emporium is packed with unique treasures.

Pam and James need to get delving as they've only bought two items for auction so far.

JAMES BRAXTON: So that's very bold.

I find that a bit gaudy.

Gaudy?

It looks sort of In your face.

JAMES BRAXTON: It is gaudy.

PAM AYRES: Tiger, yeah.

JAMES BRAXTON: Weight is always a really good guide to the material.

PAM AYRES: Gosh, it's feather light.

JAMES BRAXTON: We want bargains.

PAM AYRES: I like the [INAUDIBLE] I've got two writing slopes at home because I like old writing materials.

And that looks sort of a bit like them.

JAMES BRAXTON: What would you say, is it reproduction or is it 200 years old?

I don't know.

You're the expert.

JAMES BRAXTON: Let's see.

Oh, it's got some weight.

PAM AYRES: Does it?

Let me shift the tiger.

Shift the tiger.

Mind the priceless China.

JAMES BRAXTON: The materials are fine.

It's hardwood, it's brass.

But actually, its construction is modern.

It's, um-- No.

--a bit shonky.

Not for us then, James?

JAMES BRAXTON: Nope, we're winners.

We're winners, we are.

Sorry, tiger.

We're winners, come on.

We're not gonna buy anything shonky, are we?

NARRATOR: I should hope not.

Back in Ringwood, something small has caught Geoffrey's eye.

GEOFFREY WHITEHEAD: The little, um, cigar cutter in the bottom there.

- Oh, this one down here.

GEOFFREY WHITEHEAD: Yeah, sweet little mother of pearl.

Spotty, Geoffrey.

Ooh, it's rather fun.

WOMAN: It's dated 1904 and it says Singers on it.

I mean, who cuts cigars now?

But it's an antique item.

KATE BLISS: Do you know?

Well, spotted, Geoffrey, because that's quite an unusual little novelty, isn't it?

I think so.

I love the mother of pearl on it.

WOMAN: The mother of pearl-- KATE BLISS: Doesn't it?

WOMAN: Makes it-- yes, most definitely.

GEOFFREY WHITEHEAD: It's beautiful, isn't it?

Perfect condition.

Yeah, and it's still working, isn't it?

Will that snap together, cut a cigar end off?

I think we could get the end of a cheroot.

Are the cheroots the small ones?

WOMAN: Yes, they are.

KATE BLISS: Do you know, those would go well with our little fruit knife, our little mother of pearl.

GEOFFREY WHITEHEAD: Yeah?

KATE BLISS: Make it into a lot?

GEOFFREY WHITEHEAD: That's a good idea, so I like that.

See, so we've got a bit of a dilemma here.

Mm-hmm.

NARRATOR: The cigar cutter is priced at 35 pounds, along with the perfume bottle they found earlier, the combined total is 180 pounds.

That's 40 more than they can afford.

KATE BLISS: What's sort of thing could you do?

Well, up to-- Mm-hmm.

A straight 100 pounds for the two articles.

It's a very generous offer.

I'm happy with it.

I mean, take the chance, they're two nice items.

Mm-hmm.

You know, let's be optimistic.

KATE BLISS: I love a bit of optimism.

WOMAN: Yes?

- Yes.

Yes, [INAUDIBLE] the bill.

Quick!

Quick!

Quick, before we change our minds.

NARRATOR: So a saving of 80 pounds, that's Geoffrey and Kate all bought up for auction.

Bye-bye.

NARRATOR: Back in Winnel, Pam's spied an unusual piece of pottery.

PAM AYRES: I quite like that.

I think that's quite shapely.

JAMES BRAXTON: And this is made by somebody, isn't it?

Important-- - Yeah.

--I think.

Have I [INAUDIBLE] a sleeper, James?

This could be the sleeper-- Spode.

Is it?

NARRATOR: Spode began producing pottery in the 18th century, and are accredited with perfecting the formula for fine bone China.

So I've got an eye for quality.

JAMES BRAXTON: It's sell-like.

Can you hear the sea?

I can hear the sea.

Can you?

I can, actually.

- I know.

Whistling, isn't it?

I can.

I wrote a poem about the sea.

It is amazing.

I am clamp, the mighty limpet.

I am solid.

I am stoic.

I am welded to the rock face with my superhuman suck.

Don't you poke or prod me.

For I warn you, if you do, you stand there for a fortnite and I'll come and stick on you.

[LAUGHS] Let's just double check, make sure it hasn't been restored.

Sometimes when you touch something and it's just dead-- - Like go dunk?

- Dunk.

Mm-hmm.

I think that's all right.

Good.

I have approved your purchase.

Oh, good.

How much?

Um, it says, vintage Spode, 15 pounds.

Yes.

JAMES BRAXTON: I think a fiver.

PAM AYRES: A fiver?

A fiver, straight in there.

You're bold.

A fiver, I wouldn't have the courage to offer a fiver.

No, get in there.

Cheeky.

NARRATOR: Time to talk to Emma, who knows the vendor of the Spode vase.

Get your brass neck out, Pam.

My expert has advised me, although I'm embarrassed to say so, to offer you a fiver.

I can tell you now, he will not accept five pounds.

He's a hard-nosed [INAUDIBLE]?

Yes, he is.

He's hard-nose.

He's a hard-nose.

EMMA: 10-- 10 will probably be his lowest.

JAMES BRAXTON: 10?

EMMA: I can give him a call for you and see if they would accept 10 pounds for it.

NARRATOR: A quick call to the dealer-- EMMA: --Antiques for your shell vase.

No worries.

Bye.

NARRATOR: And it's good news.

EMMA: Yes, so you got it for 10 pounds.

Well, that's terrific.

10 pounds.

Well, can I furnish you with the money?

Absolutely.

Can I furnish you with money?

Oh, absolutely.

PAM AYRES: Thank you.

Thank you, Emma.

EMMA: Thank you very much.

Is it 10 pounds tip as well?

PAM AYRES: I'm afraid not.

NARRATOR: Nice try, Emma.

[CHUCKLES] That's another item bought for auction.

Great stuff.

JAMES BRAXTON: Great success.

I like your-- you're clutching it.

You hold it tight.

PAM AYRES: Oh, yes, I will.

I won't graze it.

- That's really nice, isn't it?

- Yes.

- It is.

- Really lovely.

It's a good one.

NARRATOR: Geoffrey and Kate have hit the road again and made their way to Southampton.

Geoffrey's character in the sitcom, "Still Open All Hours" is a keen bowler.

So Kate's taking him on a trip to the world's oldest surviving bowling green.

They're meeting archivist at Southampton Old Bowling Green, John Saunders, to find out more.

Would you like to come in to see the world's oldest bowling green?

- Oh, what a privilege.

- Come on in.

- We'd love to.

- Come on in.

- Go on in.

- Thank you.

Thank you.

After you.

KATE BLISS: Super.

NARRATOR: Although it's said that lawn bowls can be played by anyone aged from 9 to 90, it does have a reputation of being a game loved by people in their golden years.

The aim of the game is simple.

Get your balls as close as possible to the small ball known as the jack.

It might sound easy, but as the balls don't travel in a straight line, some serious skill is needed.

So balls, how did it start?

What's-- what's the early history of it?

JOHN SAUNDER: We don't honestly know.

But the assumption is that it started in Egypt.

And it was the slaves taking the pieces of stone that were left over and chipping them around so they can end roughly in a ball shape, and using a form of bowls not the same as-- not the same as today, of course not, but a form of bowls.

And then we believe that the Romans took it from Egypt and took it around their empire.

NARRATOR: The British went on to become big fans of lawn bowling with thousands of clubs across the UK, and it's been a regular event at the Commonwealth Games since they began in 1930.

GEOFFREY WHITEHEAD: How long has this green existed as an actual bowling green?

JOHN SAUNDER: Somewhere between 1185 and 1308, something like that, so we say 1299 just to be a nice round number.

GEOFFREY WHITEHEAD: Has bowls been played fairly continuously since then here?

Totally continuously.

We believe that Shakespeare actually played bowls on this green.

GEOFFREY WHITEHEAD: Really?

JOHN SAUNDER: His patron was the Earl of Southampton.

He came down here a lot.

He did play bowls, that we know.

GEOFFREY WHITEHEAD: Makes sense.

So we're sure that he played on this-- on this raid.

And in the Second World War, the one notable thing that happened here was that a nice little friendly Luftwaffe pilot decided to drop his last bomb on the corner of the green, which, you know, stopped-- it stop bowl-- bowls for about a couple of hours.

KATE BLISS: Looking at it through the centuries since the 13th century-- Yeah.

--is it-- is there a classist association?

Was it for the rich and the wealthy?

JOHN SAUNDER: Most certainly it was.

During the Tudor times, the kings, and particularly King in the Eighth who played bowls himself, he stipulated that bowls should only be played by the Gentry and those with lots of-- lots of some money, basically, because he wanted the peasants to do archery.

GEOFFREY WHITEHEAD: Oh, right.

Because that would be useful if they went to war.

Bowls was not going to be useful.

NARRATOR: Henry VIII, actually, insisted that courts fine people, who were caught playing bowls when they weren't entitled to, a whopping 10 shillings and six pence, which would be around 300 pounds in today's money.

We also have here the oldest, continuous bowling competition in the world.

GEOFFREY WHITEHEAD: Yeah?

It is bowl for a silver medal, which started in and 1776.

And the winner of the silver medal is allowed to be inducted as a Knight of the Green and must be called sir.

And his wife is called Lady in proper traditional style.

Mind you, you can't use that outside the green, it's only inside the green.

And we've got some rules that when we meet them for the first time, we've got to call them Sir Michael or Sir Ken, whatever.

If you don't, we get fined.

KATE BLISS: What about you, Geoffrey?

I can see you as a Knight of the Green.

Would you fancy that?

Yes, I think I would, actually.

Um, could we have a couple of ends now?

I'm sure you could have one.

Let's talk-- let's talk to the master of the green and see if we can get his permission.

NARRATOR: With a thumbs up from Ken, master of the green, it's time for Geoffrey and Kate to give it a bash.

KEN: So if you're playing forehand, well, you'll be forehand, right-handed.

- Yeah.

- Small one-- Yeah.

--[INAUDIBLE], which is-- And that's gonna go in like that.

- And that will go in like that.

- OK.

If you want it to play backhand, you just turn it-- Oh, no, don't confuse me.

OK.

I don't get it.

KEN: Stand on the mat and just put-- - I'm on the mat.

- --put your left foot forward.

Yeah, OK, here we go.

KATE BLISS: Ooh.

GEOFFREY WHITEHEAD: I'll tell you what.

KATE BLISS: That's pretty good-- GEOFFREY WHITEHEAD: I'll tell you what, Ken.

KATE BLISS: --Geoffrey.

I think that's an end to me, isn't it?

That's definitely [INAUDIBLE] [CLAPPING] Very good.

GEOFFREY WHITEHEAD: Oh, look at that.

OK, should we go now?

[LAUGHTER] I'm now a sir, OK?

NARRATOR: Right, Kate, give it some wellie, love.

GEOFFREY WHITEHEAD: Oof.

Well, it's got the strength.

It's got the [INAUDIBLE] KATE BLISS: Oh, a bit too slow.

GEOFFREY WHITEHEAD: It's going into the ditch.

Oh, dang!

NARRATOR: Oh, maybe a tad too much.

Time for a quick exit me thinks.

Ken, it's been an absolute delight and pleasure.

- [INAUDIBLE] it's my-- - And thank you so much.

My pleasure.

Thank you very much, indeed.

- It's been wonderful.

- Thank you very much.

GEOFFREY WHITEHEAD: All right, then.

Cup of tea, I think.

Super.

Cup of tea.

NARRATOR: Meanwhile, Pam and James still have some shopping to do and so are heading to Emsworth in Hampshire.

In your vast repertoire of poetry, Pam, have you got anything antique-related?

PAM AYRES: I loved an antique dealer.

I loved him heart and soul.

Although he was bow fronted and his legs were Cabriolet, his eyes, they were cross banded and his surface was distressed.

But he was nicely molded with a sturdy little chest.

But on examination, there were several things he lacked.

I found him dummy fronted and I found him spindle backed.

So I sent him off to auction.

Well, I've had a note from there to say he's on a pedestal in Weston-super-Mare.

[CHUCKLES] That's lovely.

NARRATOR: I think I could get used to having a resident poet on the road trip.

Right.

Pam and James have arrived at Emsworth Antiques etc.

etc.

with 300 pounds available to spend.

And I'm expecting them to buy big.

PAM AYRES: Ah, yes, I can feel a bargain coming on.

Bargain.

NARRATOR: I said big, not bargain.

[CHUCKLES] Home to the collectibles of over 25 dealers, there's plenty to choose from.

PAM AYRES: What nice little evening bags if I was going to a soiree.

But I don't go to many soirees.

Just a thing if I was intending to have a life in voice.

JAMES BRAXTON: She has an eye for humor, both in words and in objects.

PAM AYRES: I rather like that one.

It sort of looks as though he's saying, I know something you don't, my dear.

He looks as though we might go out in the middle of the night to tickle trout where he's not supposed to.

NARRATOR: Now there's an image.

Anything else you like, Pam?

PAM AYRES: This steam traction engine here.

And I like this because it reminds me of the ones that used to come to the farm over the road from where we lived in our village.

I love them because they, actually, work.

I don't necessarily think this one works, but I'm sure it could be made to work.

It's-- apparently, this one's about from the '50s.

JAMES BRAXTON: That is lovely, isn't it?

PAM AYRES: I like it.

I do like it.

Do you-- do you approve, James?

I do approve.

Oh, good.

That's very nice as well.

PAM AYRES: I like that, it's interesting.

JAMES BRAXTON: It is interesting.

PAM AYRES: And there are lots of enthusiasts, aren't there, who collect steam paraphernalia?

JAMES BRAXTON: Yeah, it's quite a sweet thing.

PAM AYRES: Mm-hmm.

JAMES BRAXTON: What price have we got?

PAM AYRES: This says 85 pounds on it.

JAMES BRAXTON: Yeah, 85 pounds.

NARRATOR: Before you try to do a deal on the traction engine, James quite fancies a couple of jars.

PAM AYRES: Gosh, it's heavy.

JAMES BRAXTON: It is heavy.

PAM AYRES: It's really heavy.

Oh, there's two of them.

JAMES BRAXTON: Yeah.

The golden rule to buying-- buy antiques by Braxton is by weight.

They're known as prep-ware.

These were sort of jars.

Lots of companies commissioned them.

You might have cosmetic things or fish paste.

Various things were put in these things.

And they would have had a lid on the top.

All right.

JAMES BRAXTON: They're printed, and they were printed in the mid-19th century, Victorian times.

PAM AYRES: They're nice, aren't they?

The colors are beautiful.

Yeah.

Badly damaged, isn't it?

Yeah, it's damaged.

There's a big heap of fish there.

Yeah, they've been a bit beaten up.

How much do they cost, James?

They're 30 quid each.

30 pounds each, gosh.

Do you think these would be a good thing for me to buy?

I think they might be a nice thing to do.

Yeah, they're usual, aren't they?

NARRATOR: But first, Hilary is calling the vendor of the 85 pound traction engine to broker a deal.

It's your favorite expert.

Yes, it's James Braxton.

And it's your favorite poet, Pam Ayres.

Oh, my goodness.

Oh, what a combination.

I will let them know.

Thank you so much.

Bye.

Since it's you two-- - Yeah.

--40.

[GASPS] Oh, my goodness, beyond our wildest dream.

Beyond our wildest hopes, we are the proud owners of a traction engine.

Oh, a traction engine.

I really like that.

- So 40, we'll take that.

- Thank you.

Thank you very much.

And what could you do on the recovered pots?

What can you do on that?

HILARY CRAVEN: They're 30 each, which would make 60.

How do you feel about 35?

How do you feel about 35?

[CHUCKLES] Well, I think it's an extraordinarily kind offer.

I think it's a very kind offer.

I think that's lovely, Hilary.

We accept with gratitude.

- May I shake your hand?

- You may.

JAMES BRAXTON: Thank you, thank you.

May I also shake your hand?

HILARY CRAVEN: Thank you.

- Thank you.

Never going to wash. [CHUCKLES] I would.

NARRATOR: There you have it, 75 pounds means Pam and James are all bought up for auction.

Hurrah.

Right, time for our teams to reunite and show off their buys.

I love this bit.

JAMES BRAXTON: Come on.

KATE BLISS: Come on, come on.

JAMES BRAXTON: Let's get this cloth off.

- Oh, my God.

- Ooh.

JAMES BRAXTON: There we are.

Look at that.

KATE BLISS: What do you think, Geoffrey?

GEOFFREY WHITEHEAD: A bear of character.

PAM AYRES: Indeed.

JAMES BRAXTON: Bear of character.

That is a large bear.

He's laying there and looking a bit corpse like, but-- Is that one of Watt's original engines?

PAM AYRES: Absolutely, indeed, I think-- Yes, yes, well done.

It's very nice.

Oh, and a tiny little-- Any one for tea?

JAMES BRAXTON: Little tea.

And the rest of this is pots really, isn't it?

Indeed, yes.

PAM AYRES: --got the pots.

And you can hear the sea.

And that, you can hold to your ear.

GEOFFREY WHITEHEAD: Do you put things in there, do you?

JAMES BRAXTON: Yeah.

KATE BLISS: It's a-- it's a cornucopia.

PAM AYRES: Yeah, cornucopia.

JAMES BRAXTON: Come on, let's see your goodies.

Are you ready?

Let's have a look at yours.

Yes, we certainly are.

KATE BLISS: Come on, then.

I'm going to gingerly-- here we go because ours are rather fragile.

Ooh, it looks pretty.

Very pretty.

KATE BLISS: Ta-da.

GEOFFREY WHITEHEAD: I know you're rather into bamboo and-- I love bamboo.

KATE BLISS: But there's more, more.

JAMES BRAXTON: More?

KATE BLISS: Ta-da!

JAMES BRAXTON: Oh, you've become all architectural on us.

GEOFFREY WHITEHEAD: Indeed, yes.

- Pair off-- PAM AYRES: Locked doors and shattered windows.

- Yeah.

- Ya.

GEOFFREY WHITEHEAD: And don't forget these small items.

PAM AYRES: Oh, no.

They-- they are quite small.

I can-- I can see, Geoffrey, you're quite proud of your items.

GEOFFREY WHITEHEAD: Well, I owe a lot to my expert.

I like the perfume bottle.

I think that's very, very pretty.

KATE BLISS: It is.

It's Guerlain.

PAM AYRES: How much was it?

Mhm.

Uh, go on.

Well, it was 90, but it's a jolly good name.

Look-- GEOFFREY WHITEHEAD: Guerlain.

KATE BLISS: --fresh from Paris.

JAMES BRAXTON: And what about your loooove to doors?

GEOFFREY WHITEHEAD: My shutters?

JAMES BRAXTON: Your shutters.

Yes, your shutters.

GEOFFREY WHITEHEAD: [LAUGHS] My shutters were rather expensive, and I think they ran at 175 pounds.

Possibly.

Oh, heavens.

Stop smiling, Pam.

GEOFFREY WHITEHEAD: I heavily invested in those.

KATE BLISS: If we're gonna do it, we do it big.

GEOFFREY WHITEHEAD: Indeed.

JAMES BRAXTON: Quality.

GEOFFREY WHITEHEAD: Well, if you wanna-- wanna battle, you've got one, you know.

OK, before we go I'm just going to read you my little verse, which I have composed for the occasion.

James is suave and very nice.

I hope he gave me good advice.

My sales will make poor Geoffrey gulp and beat my rival to a pulp.

What do you think?

Very good.

GEOFFREY WHITEHEAD: We'll see you in Cirencester.

[LAUGHTER] I'm loving the suave.

Yeah.

NARRATOR: Time now to tell the truth and no lies.

What did they really think of each other's buys?

KATE BLISS: So what did you think of their items?

We've nothing to worry about.

I love the perfume bottle.

It's such a lovely, classic shape, very beautiful.

The bear's nice, you know, amusing.

But really, there's no comparison to some-- I mean, the shutters alone.

The shutters, I'm concerned about, seems an awful lot of money for a pile of old wood.

But I may be proved horribly wrong.

We've definitely got better quality, but I don't think they spent very much money.

So it could be all about the shutters.

And if the shutters are a goer, no question, we're ahead.

Cirencester will buy those shutters.

Do you think we'll-- we'll beat them to a pulp?

Oh, probably.

Jeez, I don't know.

I don't know.

I'm usually wrong, but we can only be optimistic.

Go on.

Let's go to the auction.

Go on.

NARRATOR: After starting in Sparsholt, our teams have shopped around Berkshire and Hampshire.

And Pam and Geoffrey are now motoring towards Cirencester for the big finale.

We're steaming up, Pam.

PAM AYRES: It seems to be a way of life for us.

We get in the car and the windows steam up.

Well, what does that tell you?

[CHUCKLES] I'd rather not speculate.

Have you got any experience of auction?

I do.

I go quite frequently, but not to sell.

I've got so much stuff that I should sell, I think, like most people, but I buy a lot.

NARRATOR: Well, remember, selling is the name of the game today.

Kate and James have already arrived at Moore Allen and Innocent auction room and are waiting patiently for their celebrity partners.

Do you think the car's broken down?

NARRATOR: Thankfully not, Kate.

Here they come.

JAMES BRAXTON: Hop in, hop in.

Well done.

Good morning.

Good morning.

Good morning.

KATE BLISS: Come on in, it's all happening.

Hello again, please.

How are you?

How are you?

GEOFFREY WHITEHEAD: Nice to see you.

- This is it, is it?

- This is it.

Very good.

NARRATOR: On this road trip, Pam and James spent 165 pounds on five auction lots.

Geoffrey and Kate also bought five lots, but they spent a whopping 375 pounds.

The man with the gavel is Philip Allwood.

So what does he make of everyone's lots?

PHILIP ALLWOOD: Mambo traction engines, I had one of these as a kid, great.

One thing you need to really get people going is the little tiny bit on the top that helps you steer it, which is missing, and the box.

But maybe 50 to 80 pounds, that sort of level.

The box makes all the difference with these things.

Now the wooden shutters, I do like.

They've got all the original metalwork, really quite a nice pair.

I wouldn't expect them to do great guns-- 70 to 90, 80 to 100 pounds, that sort of level around there.

NARRATOR: Right, it's the moment of truth.

Time for the auction, which has buyers online and in the room.

Excited?

I am.

NARRATOR: First up, Pam's porcelain children's tea set.

Five pounds a bid there, at 5.

At 5, 6, 8, 10 on the net now.

10, 12 to [INAUDIBLE] 12.

At 12 pounds, 15-- Go on.

PHILIP ALLWOOD: --down the net, you're hovering at 12 pounds.

[INAUDIBLE] running from of me then at 12 pounds.

I don't have any 12.

And you loss it on the net at 12.

12-- Wow.

Well done, Pam.

- Well done, Pam.

- Yeah.

- Very good.

- Thank you.

Well done.

Very good, very good.

NARRATOR: Very good, indeed.

Pam's more than doubled her money on her first lot.

Oh, well, that was a good start, wasn't it?

Good start.

Good start.

[INAUDIBLE].

[CHUCKLES] NARRATOR: Speaking of scent, next up is Geoffrey's vintage perfume bottle.

20 pound a bid there, at 20 pounds.

5 if you like now.

At 20 pounds, 5?

Thank you, Madam.

Eh, bidder over there, 25.

You're off now.

Geoffrey, you're off now.

PHILIP ALLWOOD: 25, 30 a bid now.

At 25, 35, 5 at 35,40 if you like.

At 35, 40 if you like now.

Old shorts on my left at 35.

2, 1, 2.

35.

[GROANS] NARRATOR: Rotten luck, old chap.

It's a rough and tumble, Geoffrey.

Yes.

You know, but sometimes-- And we've still got the shutters.

[LAUGHTER] NARRATOR: That's it, positive thinking, Geoffrey.

Up next are the prep-ware jars that James fancied.

Watch and learn, watch and learn.

20 pounds.

At 20 pound a bid, thank you.

25-- Oh, we're off.

PHILIP ALLWOOD: 35, 40.

At 40 pounds here on my left now.

40 down.

5 if you like now.

I have 40 pounds.

It's the lady's bid in front of me then.

JAMES BRAXTON: Well done.

God bless you, ma'am.

Yeah, absolutely.

She's made a favor.

PHILIP ALLWOOD: I made a mistake.

At 40 pounds, you all [INAUDIBLE],, 40.

GEOFFREY WHITEHEAD: Made a mistake.

[CHUCKLES] Well, I didn't think that was gonna happen.

[LAUGHTER] NARRATOR: You did pick them, James.

Another small profit for team Pam there.

Look after the pennies and the pounds will look after themselves.

OK, Pam.

NARRATOR: You've gotta make some pennies first though.

Let's hope Geoffrey can get off the mark with his Edwardian bamboo magazine rack.

At 20 pounds, I have it.

20 pound, 5 anywhere?

At 20 pounds for the Canterbury.

At 20, 5, thank you.

JAMES BRAXTON: See, look, hands everywhere, Geoffrey.

Hands everywhere.

PHILIP ALLWOOD: At 30 Pounds, going to be cheap at 30 pounds here.

All sure now then selling right in front of me then at 30 pounds.

You're all done here now.

Then at 30.

GEOFFREY WHITEHEAD: What a steal.

JAMES BRAXTON: What a steal.

- That is a steal.

There is no accounting for taste.

No.

I'm sorry, Geoffrey.

I am sorry.

[CHUCKLES] NARRATOR: Don't get too disheartened yet, Geoffrey.

There's still time to make a comeback.

Well, that was-- that's a shame.

Ridiculous!

NARRATOR: Pam's up next.

This time, it's her Spode cornucopia shaped vase.

5 and a bid there.

7, 10 on the net now.

At 10 pounds, 12 if you like now.

At 10 pounds, it is on the net here for the Spode.

At 10 pounds, 12 anywhere?

Oh, sure.

Then it's selling here at 10 pounds.

It's on the net now.

You're all out the room at 10 pounds, you all [INAUDIBLE], for a tenner.

[GASPS] 10 pounds.

The hammer's down.

NARRATOR: Not quite the result Pam was hoping for, but it could be worse.

She could be in Geoffrey's shoes.

[CHUCKLES] Have you got up to 100 pounds yet?

[LAUGHTER] PHILIP ALLWOOD: And lot number one-- We're a long way off, Geoffrey.

NARRATOR: But Geoffrey, can you finally find a profit with your Napoleon brass pipe temper?

At 10 pounds, gentlemen's bid at 10 pounds at the back there.

At 10 pounds, 12 if you like now.

At 12, thank you.

At 12, 15, 18.

At 18, 20.

KATE BLISS: They're waking up.

PHILIP ALLWOOD: At 20 pounds in the back now.

20 pounds, 5.

Now 5.

I laughed too soon.

25, Geoffrey.

At 25 pounds here on my left then.

At 25.

Thank you, sir.

Well, it's a profit.

Well done, well done.

Yeah, well done.

NARRATOR: At last, a profit for Geoffrey.

You've done this before, Geoffrey, haven't you?

Hey?

NARRATOR: Play nice, James.

Time to see what the people of Cirencester make of Pam's model steam traction engine.

30 pounds?

30 pounds a bid here on the net now.

30 pounds, 5, anyone now?

It should have a starting handle.

It should have a starting handle.

PHILIP ALLWOOD: 35, 40 now.

At 45, thank you.

40 now, 5.

50 main, 50, 5.

JAMES BRAXTON: I didn't think this is gonna happen.

They're building up steam, Pam.

They're building up a good head of steam.

PHILIP ALLWOOD: At 55 pounds right in front of me now.

The whole show then selling at 55.

Well, I'm very pleased.

- Not bad.

- Not bad.

Well done, Pam.

I thought that a disgrace.

NARRATOR: Certainly not, that's another profit for Pam.

We're making steady progress.

See we weren't rushed like somebody.

[CHUCKLES] NARRATOR: Right, Geoffrey, can you make two profits in a row with your Edwardian fruit knife and cigar cutter?

20 pound a bid, thank you.

And 20 pounds, 5 if you like.

Madam, 5.

At 25 in the front now.

25, 30 if you like.

Now, 30.

At 30 pounds, 5.

At 35 right now.

35, 45 if you like-- Just to win profit.

Profit!

At 35, 40 now.

At 35.

PAM AYRES: I'm a very worried woman.

35 here on the right then.

Come on.

PHILIP ALLWOOD: Whole show now, then at 35.

You're all done.

KATE BLISS: Come on.

PHILIP ALLWOOD: 201.

- 35.

- Not bad.

Well done.

Profit.

NARRATOR: Smile, Geoffrey, any profit is a good profit.

I've had it with antiques.

[CHUCKLES] Now don't be so downhearted.

It's not all over yet.

NARRATOR: Although it nearly is for Pam as it's time for her final lot, her beloved teddy bear.

20 pound a bid there, thank you.

20 pounds, 5, anyone now?

At 25, 30 now.

At 30 pounds a bid here.

At 35, 5, anyway now?

At 30 pounds.

It is right in front of me then.

Selling here.

Made a mistake.

Thought it might make a little more.

At 30 pounds, you all [INAUDIBLE],, at 30.

30 pounds, that's 212.

Oh, Pam.

Shame.

Now you know how I feel.

NARRATOR: No wonder teddy looks sad.

That's a disappointing loss for Pam.

Geoffrey, I can see a little small smile.

Oh, not at all.

A smile of triumph is flickering over your lips, Geoffrey.

NARRATOR: Time for the biggie, Geoffrey's priciest and last lot, the 19th century French shutters.

Will his big gamble pay off?

Starting at 100.

100 to be cheap, 100?

Ooh, nothing.

There's 100 pounds a bid there.

100, 110-- - See?

Well done.

Oh, I'm feeling very nervous.

Yep, 100 pounds, looks cheap, but 100, 110 if you like.

At 100 pounds, it's here.

Maiden bid on the net now at 100 pounds-- They're missing such a chance.

100 pounds, you all [INAUDIBLE] 100 pounds, actually, I'm surprised because they look a bit ramshackled to me.

Oh, Pam.

- Pam!

- [CHUCKLES] PHILIP ALLWOOD: --well, thank you right now.

NARRATOR: Ooh, what [INAUDIBLE] And before we find out who's won, Pam's got something to say.

Have the shutters closed on Geoffrey's hopes?

My bitter rival, is he on the ropes?

Has my teddy thrown my hopes away, or will we live to bid another day?

[CLAPPING] NARRATOR: Let's find out, shall we?

Geoffrey and Kate started with 400 pounds.

After paying auction costs, they sat to make a loss of 190 pounds and 50 pence, ending their trip with 209 pounds and 50 pence.

Pam and James also kicked off at 400 pounds and unfortunately, also made a lot of 44 pounds and 46 pence.

As their loss was less, they're crowned today's winning losers, if you get my drift, finishing with 355 pounds and 54 pence.

We won.

We won, we won.

Oh, we won.

We actually won.

[INAUDIBLE] we won.

NARRATOR: So with Pam victorious, it's time for our celebrities to bid a fond farewell.

JAMES BRAXTON: Geoffrey-- Yes.

--beware of architectural salvage.

Yes.

[CHUCKLES] KATE BLISS: Architectural salvage.

I'm sad it's over.

I'm so sad it's over.

Bye.

Did you enjoy doing the road trip with me?

I have absolutely.

it's been one of the highlights of my career.

[CHUCKLES] GEOFFREY WHITEHEAD: I expect the big spin-offs.

Something's going to happen from this, Pam.

PAM AYRES: And I've liked being with you because I think you're very nice and you make me laugh.

Well, what could one say about the legend that is Pam Ayres?

[CHUCKLES] Not much.

[CONTINUED CHUCKLES] NARRATOR: Until next time, toodle-pip, road trippers.

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