(choir singing) - And you hear the sound swirl over your head.

- I have always had a calling whispering in my ear, but I wasn't really sure how to define it.

- Yeah.

- Because I'm gay.

- Now how does a 14 year old get that kind of money?

- I was a mule.

- Aging is inevitable, but getting old is an option.

(gentle peaceful music) - Welcome to "Getting Dot Older," the new TV series where Americans over 50 share intimate, personal revelations about aging.

I'm your host, Roberto Mighty.

This series interviews people live and online and asks everyone the same questions, like question number eight, "I felt old for the first time when," and number 15, "My greatest regret is."

You can answer these questions on our online survey.

So join us, stay tuned on TV, and I'm looking forward to hearing your story online.

(upbeat cheerful music) In our Boomer Passions segment, Ralph sings with the men's choir.

Ophelia combines spirituality and high fashion.

Richard was a teen aged drug mule.

Newman shares becoming an out, gay minister.

Our Boomer Quiz is about the "Twilight Zone," and viewers share revealing answers to our online survey.

(gentle peaceful music) My next guest didn't start out with any advantages.

- Originally, I was born in San Antonio, Texas.

My mother was from Crow Reservation, my father was stationed, he was in the Air Force, stationed in Montana, and I heard he saw this beautiful woman, long black hair, walking down the street, and here I am.

(pair laughs) - That's great, man.

For his parents, it was love at first sight.

For Richard, it was the beginning of a challenging childhood.

- So it was kind of like a dysfunctional after that.

I wound up going on my own when I turned 11, 12, you know, hit the streets- - Wow.

- And- - So what happened that you were on your own at 11?

- Well, from what I gather, or from what I've heard, when my father took my mother back to San Antonio, the family rejected her, and rejected him for marrying her, and rejected me for being halfbreed- - Oh man.

- So, we (voice distorts) until, and we wandered, and I needed to latch onto something and the guys on the corner were the most accepting.

So I ran on the corner and then just, (censored) with school, (censored) with everything.

As a matter of fact, I don't even remember, like, eating or washing or sleeping or changing clothes, I don't remember any of that.

I don't know if it was traumatic or just (voice distorts) I didn't wanna relish, or didn't wanna hold on to- - Richard has suppressed memories of the three years between being abandoned by his parents and taken in by the gangs.

His story picks up around age 14.

- You know, you make a little money, you gain notoriety, you become popular, the girls like the way you dress or whatever, I had a Thunderbird when I was 14 or 15.

- What?

(laughs) - Can you imagine that?

- Now how does a 14 year old get that kind of money?

- I was a mule.

(voice breaking up) - I hear you.

- I could run faster than the police dogs.

(pair laughs) And I could do the hurdles over a fence like it was nothin', man.

- Right.

(laughs) So did you go to juvie, ever?

Did you ever go to juvie?

- No, no no, but I went into the Army the day I turned 17 because by that time, the time of 14 to 17, in that line of work, you make enemies and there's a lot of competition and there's a lot of people who wanna put you down.

- When Richard joined the Army, he had to leave the gangs behind.

I wondered about that transition.

Was it difficult to cut ties with those guys and, you know, I'm just curious, or was that not a problem once you joined the Army?

- I don't recall, like, feeling bad about leaving that environment because what the Army and all that offered was something new, was something different, was something I kind of felt was interesting and exciting and maybe even educational.

I just wanted to try something different, but I knew even though I come from criminals and all that, deep down, I was a warrior, no matter, maybe from my mother's side.

So I flourished in the military.

I rose through the ranks rapidly.

I went through all those advanced academies in schooling and all that and I did really, really well.

So for a while there, I thought it was my calling.

So coming back to your question, I think it was the right choice, leaving those guys.

- Richard is now 64 years old and has a successful career in real estate.

We'll hear more of my interview with him in an upcoming episode of "Getting Dot Older," but what about you?

Did you have a tough start in life that you managed to turn around?

How did you do that?

And who helped you along the way?

Is there anyone you would like to thank on the air?

(gentle cheerful music) ♪ Joyful joyful, we adore thee ♪ ♪ God of glory, Lord of love ♪ (upbeat cheery music) ♪ Oh can't you see that look in my eye ♪ ♪ We're running out of time, we're running out of time ♪ ♪ Can you hear it when I talk to you ♪ ♪ There's something going on inside ♪ ♪ I don't know what I got to do ♪ ♪ I don't know what I got to say ♪ ♪ I don't know what I- ♪ (cheery peaceful music) Thanks to all the viewers who are filling out our "Getting Dot Older" online survey.

Here's a viewer survey response from Larry.

Here's his answer to question number nine.

"When I was a child, I wanted to be, and now I am."

So Larry says, "When I was a child, "I wanted to be someone famous for something that I did.

"Now I am satisfied with being just the way that I am."

Larry, thank you for sharing.

(gentle music) (cheery upbeat music) My next guest found his true calling late in life.

But was it really a surprise?

- I have a little bit of a different background, I guess, because my parents were missionaries in Central America, and that's where I grew up.

(laughs) - Small world.

Muy bien.

(laughs) - Yeah.

I lived in what was British Honduras, at the time, since the age of five- - Right.

- Until it became Belize, and then, you know, worked alongside my parents who provided a ministry to children without families.

- Growing up with parents on a mission can be a challenge.

Did you ever feel that, gosh, you know, yeah, it's okay that you're doing God's work, but what about, you know, my peanut butter and jelly sandwich, or whatever it is.

(laughs) - No, that's a great question, and I think that's an important subject for me and a lot because I, the way that I was impacted by their giving and caring of others, was I admired it and I appreciated it, and I was proud to be a part of it.

But at the same time, particularly my dad's attention was not, did not meet my needs as a child growing up.

- Yeah.

I wondered about Newman's choice of profession.

So now I can't help but notice that you're wearing a collar and let me just ask you, had you always thought you were going to go into, you know, this line of work, (chuckles) I hate to call it a line of work, right, but- - Oh it is, it is.

The calling, the work, the vocation, however you wanna put it, but you know, well let me just put it like this, (censored) no.

(Roberto laughs) I never wanted to- (laughs) - Great.

(laughing) - You know?

So the thing is, I have always had a calling whispering in my ear, but I wasn't really sure how to define it.

- Yeah.

- Because I'm gay.

So that makes it really, you know, that's a dynamic, especially, you know, it still is an issue for a lot of people, but back in, when I grew up, I mean, I grew up, actually, in Belize, they never heard the word.

So I had no identity to who I was, really, until I came back to the states.

So having, you know, I really discovered my ministry while I, as a hairstylist, you know, from behind the chair, and talking to people, and listening to people.

- I mean, that's fascinating.

So why don't you tell us a bit about that, you know, that transition.

- Well, you know, I don't feel like it was a transition, literally, except when I recognized it.

And it was one of my clients who helped me to recognize it.

That was what was interesting.

And I had a client that has passed since, but he used to refer to me as Reverend Hairstylist.

- (laughs) This is great.

That's really great.

(laughs) - Yeah, yeah, and so- - And wait, now why was that?

- (laughs) I have been, you know, sought out for listening, you know, I just call it listening 'cause I'm not a therapist or a counselor in, you know, the profession.

I am under, of course, under being an ordained minister, but the thing is, I realized that I was conducting ministry because that was my, you know, that's my space that I grew up in and familiar with.

- Right.

- And making people look good, but they would, (laughs) but they would leave and tell me things like, "I just feel so good."

- But making people feel good wasn't enough for Newman.

- So it was more just recent, the last year, when one of my clients, when I told them, I said, "Well, I know what my calling is, "it's grief support," 'cause that's really what ministry is all about, it's about the losses and changes in life.

- Yeah.

- And so, and being there and listening to people, and you know, you know, giving some direction and helping them to feel strong enough to face it and all of those things.

So I already knew the format that I wanted to use, but I just could not figure out how to really go about it.

When my client said, "Become an ordained minister," (Roberto laughs) and I went, "Yeah!"

(Newman laughs) - Of course.

(laughs) It's obvious.

- Yeah, Reverend Hairstylist, of course.

(pair laughing) - So wait, now how old were you when you became an ordained minister?

- Oh, that was just last year.

Yeah, it took COVID to make me take a break to think and really, you know, and aging.

You know, I'm 66.

So you know, having that awareness that my physical, you know, endurance is not, you know, not at the level I need to do enough clients for it to be, you know, a real business.

- Right.

- It's very taxing on me physically.

- Yeah.

- So I begin thinking about, well, what kind of transition do I wanna make and use my gifts and keep going?

- We'll hear more of my interview with Newman in an upcoming episode, but what about You?

Have you made or would you like to make a major change in your life at this point?

If not, what are you waiting for?

If so, what took you so long?

(chuckles) (gentle cheery music) Here's a viewer survey response from Linda.

Here's her answer to question number five, "The thing I love most about my age now is," Linda says, "The thing I love most about my age now is "you can say the most outrageous things "and mostly be excused," and she points out that she has white hair, which is a good alibi.

Linda, I've seen that in action, you're right, and thank you for sharing.

(gentle cheery music) I first met Ophelia and her sisters when they had a posh clothing boutique at a fancy address in Boston.

40 years later, Ophelia filled out one of our "Getting Dot Older" viewer surveys.

I was shocked to learn about their journey from humble beginnings to high fashion.

- Hi, my name's Ophelia and I'm originally from Covington, Georgia.

Came to Boston in 1947, my mother moved us here.

- You mentioned that you grew up in this Covington, Georgia- - Georgia, yes.

- You said that you grew up in humble beginnings.

Can you describe, what do you mean by that?

- Real humble.

(sighs) Well, say for instance, we, my father died when I was seven.

- I'm sorry to hear that.

- And, yeah, so long ago, so long ago, but he died when I was seven, and we didn't have a lot, I mean, when we moved to Boston, we moved out of a, do you know what a shotgun shack is?

- No.

- (laughs) Roberto.

- Sorry.

- A shotgun shack is like, it's a name, it was like, if you shot through it, goes straight through, so it's just three rooms lined up.

- I see.

Like they have those in New Orleans, okay, yes yes.

- Yeah, and that's where I came from.

And my mother picked cotton.

So we're talking the 50s- - Right.

- And before I started school, my sister, Wanda and I would go with her on these trips.

Wanda was two years younger than me, so my mother had made me a little cotton picking sack to just help her, not saying like like I was gonna make a big dent in it, but to keep me busy, and they said my job was to keep an eye on Wanda to when she took her naps.

So I would always take, but it was the most amazing experience.

- Yes.

- Picking cotton, and it was, I don't know, it was like, my mother had to stay bent over.

You couldn't stand up, you had to crouch to pick cotton.

And about 12:00, the man would come around with water for the cotton pickers- - Okay.

- And they would drink from a, what do you call it, like a ladder or something?

A cup- - Okay, yeah.

- Yeah.

- Right, right.

- And so I found that very amazing, and then at the end of the day, when, all the cotton that the individual picked, was weighed, so it was like a bale of cotton.

So, and then you got your wages and they would bring you back, I remember we rode on a pickup truck- - Okay.

The image of someone laboring in a cotton field is pretty far from how Ophelia carries herself today.

I wondered what she thought about her journey.

- Being a little girl who witnessed picking cotton, who eventually owned a store in Copley Place- - It's amazing.

- Next door to Dior, you know what I mean, so- - Right.

- And Roberto, what is really amazing, none of us had ever worked in a store.

- Throughout our interview, Ophelia spoke in spiritual terms.

I asked her about her philosophical ideas.

- I was raised in a church and I was always a very curious child.

I always thought, you know, where am I, what is this place?

And no one could answer that.

I would go to church with my mother and the preacher would be preaching and I just didn't get any answers about, I think I was 25- - Mmhmm.

- And all of a sudden, I started to feel, like something was inside of me and I couldn't quite describe it.

It was like something was in there.

I would say, "What is inside of me?"

And my sister, Rashida, was always into Yoga, even back then, in the 60s, yoga, so I went to Rashida, I said, "Rashida, "something's inside of me," and she said, "What?"

I said, "I don't know, it feels like another person."

She's said, "Oh, I got a book for you."

And before that book, basically, I was reading romance novels.

- Okay.

- I was reading, you know, just little nothing stuff, but it was always about love- - Mmhmm.

- No matter what.

So what I did, she gave me the book, it was called, "The Religions of Man."

- Hm.

- And what it did, it identified the different religions in the world, but what I got out of the book, all these religions, there was one power- - Mm.

- And I wanted to know that power.

So I started, nothing happened, I just wanted to know.

And from that, a friend of mine introduced me to a book called, "Siddhartha."

I was probably, when I got this book, I was probably in my early 30s, and it was about the Buddha.

- Oh yes.

- The Buddha and his journey into realizing what his purpose is on Earth.

So basically, when I say, "Having a human experience," I'm here to find out why I'm on this planet and to express it, and part of that was expressing it through fashion.

That's why I would say, yeah, fashion.

So you have different ways of expressing, like you, yours is filmmaking.

- Right.

- So I always tell people, a great part of me, I believe, you know, when people tell me how I maintain my youthfulness, and I think a great deal of that has to do with me pursuing doing what I love.

- Ophelia's 75 years include marriage, divorce, having children, deaths of loved ones, success in business, retirement, and modeling.

We'll hear more of my interview with her in an upcoming episode.

But what about you?

Did you come from humble beginnings?

Are you a spiritual seeker?

(upbeat rhythmic music) (clapping hands) (upbeat rhythmic music continues) ♪ I got a savior in the kingdom ♪ ♪ Ain't a that good news?

Ain't a that good news?

♪ ♪ Ain't a that good news- ♪ - And you know, you're in some of these recital halls, and you hear the sound swirl over your head.

♪ 'Tis a gift to be loved and to love in return ♪ - Since 1871, the Apollo Club of Boston, a men's choral group, has been lifting their voices in song.

After 150 years, the Apollo Club is the second oldest continuously active men's singing group in the United States.

I spoke with two of the members and asked them why they stick with it.

What do you think keeps the members coming back?

- It's almost like a family.

You know, we support each other, you know, we all work together, and I have to say, I think as a whole, musicians have great attitudes.

There's some kind of venting or, (laughs) releasing.

I know, when I was working, you could sit at the piano, you could have the worst day, you sit down, five minutes, everything just evaporates, all the tension, all the stress goes.

So I have to say, number one, musicians as a whole I find are a pretty happy group.

And I think because if call it in sync, you have to work together.

- You know, we're all in it together, joyfully.

So here we go, right from where we start.

♪ Joyful joyful, we adore thee ♪ ♪ God of glory, Lord of love ♪ - You asked about, you know, why I like the Apollo Club and why we're doing it, you know, I joined in 1981, so it was over 40 years, I missed a few years when I was coaching baseball with my kids, you know, 'cause it was just too much going on with work and that sort of thing.

♪ I got a crown up in the kingdom, ♪ ♪ Ain't a that good news ♪ ♪ I got a crown up in the kingdom, ♪ ♪ Ain't a that good news ♪ - The club typically gives 17 to 18 recitals per year.

Many of these concerts are at senior centers and nursing homes.

Can you describe emotionally what it feels like when all of you are singing together and the harmonizing, you know, feels good and sounds good, what is that like?

- It's like Heaven.

It's just, when it fits and it works, and you hear the tones and the overtones, and everything comes together, especially when you're singing with an orchestra, and you know, you're in some of these recital halls, and you hear the sounds swirl over your head, and just come back to you, it's Heaven.

♪ Tis a gift to be simple, tis is a gift to be free ♪ ♪ Tis a gift to come down where we ought to be ♪ - [Roberto] You don't have to be a trained musician or an experienced singer to audition for the Apollo Club.

The training comes from weekly rehearsals led by two professionals, conductor Steven Lipsitt, and accompanist, Rob Humphreys.

(gentle choir music) (lyrics indiscernible) (choir music continues) - Nice, good.

- Would you have any words of wisdom if people wanted to start a group like the Apollo Club, or perhaps join a group like the Apollo, any overarching words of wisdom or advice you'd give about that?

- Yeah, I think you need consistency, like I would say, you know, like once a week you've got to commit and go to it.

And of course, you'd need a couple, like we have two professionals.

You need someone professional, at least one.

(conductor instructing) (choir sings enthusiastically) (audience applauds) (upbeat cheery music) (upbeat cheery music continues) - Thanks so much.

Please go to our website and take our survey and let us know if you're interested in doing a video call interview with me.

I'm really looking forward to hearing your story online.

(gentle peaceful music) (gentle ringing music) (cheerful carefree music) (energetic music)